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TeresaRudolph71 · 51-55, F
Micromanaging them.
Not allowing them to talk about things that are bothering them, or work through their emotions in a healthy way. Forcing them to stuff everything inside.
Doing everything for them and not allowing them to become self-sufficient, to keep them dependent upon them.
Laughing at them when they talk about their hopes and dreams, or what they want to do when they grow up. Undermining their self-confidence at every opportunity.
Assuming that they are to blame if they ever have a conflict with someone else. Of course, the opposite is just as bad - insisting that their perfect little angel can do no wrong if they hear that their child has done something bad. Getting to the truth is important, but sadly not all parents seem to feel that it's worth the effort to get to the bottom of things, when it's easier to make assumptions based on how they're feeling at the moment.
Not allowing them to have any personal boundaries. Reading their diary, snooping through their personal belongings, listening in on their phone conversations if they happen to be talking on a landline (my dad did that to me once, back before I had a cell phone).
Comparing them to their siblings, asking them why they can't be more like their brother or sister.
Not allowing them to talk about things that are bothering them, or work through their emotions in a healthy way. Forcing them to stuff everything inside.
Doing everything for them and not allowing them to become self-sufficient, to keep them dependent upon them.
Laughing at them when they talk about their hopes and dreams, or what they want to do when they grow up. Undermining their self-confidence at every opportunity.
Assuming that they are to blame if they ever have a conflict with someone else. Of course, the opposite is just as bad - insisting that their perfect little angel can do no wrong if they hear that their child has done something bad. Getting to the truth is important, but sadly not all parents seem to feel that it's worth the effort to get to the bottom of things, when it's easier to make assumptions based on how they're feeling at the moment.
Not allowing them to have any personal boundaries. Reading their diary, snooping through their personal belongings, listening in on their phone conversations if they happen to be talking on a landline (my dad did that to me once, back before I had a cell phone).
Comparing them to their siblings, asking them why they can't be more like their brother or sister.
Awfullybrave · F
@TeresaRudolph71 sad 😔
TheIncredibleHulka · 31-35, F
@TeresaRudolph71 I can relate to some of these points being followed at our home and I feel sorry for myself. 😅
My parents were (still are) control freaks and they once made it very difficult for me to attend my music classes when they discovered a guy they didn't like much was interested in me. I had a nervous breakdown shortly after that experience and had to be taken for counseling where the doctor asked them to give me some space. Sadly that didn't happen.
My parents were (still are) control freaks and they once made it very difficult for me to attend my music classes when they discovered a guy they didn't like much was interested in me. I had a nervous breakdown shortly after that experience and had to be taken for counseling where the doctor asked them to give me some space. Sadly that didn't happen.
TeresaRudolph71 · 51-55, F
@TheIncredibleHulka I'm so sorry to hear that. I know, it's very hard to live with parents like that. I hope things are better now, though I know that people like that rarely change for the better.
Platoscave · F