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What makes parenthood so infinitely worthwhile? Is it worth it? Why?

I've talked to parents who say that... well, what it comes down to is that you can make a list of all the costs and sacrifices that go along with being a parent, compared to the rewards, and on paper it looks like you've come off worse for it... and yet, if you look below the paper, and at the real truth of it - the rewards are infinitely greater than the costs. I don't have kids - I don't want kids. I suspect that my particularly bad childhood has destroyed in me whatever it is that makes most people want kids.

So my question is: can you put into words what it is that makes parenthood so infinitely worthwhile?
SW-User
Not an easy thing to put into words. I expect it's both a unique and a universal feeling among people who feel children are beyond worth it.

For me, children are the epitome of all that I love. They give and need compassion, empathy, love, understanding.

They highlight all of a parent's strengths and weaknesses, therefore you are challenged to grow and change with your kids.

They are hungry... hungry for knowledge, danger, wisdom, adventure, stories, etc and they want to be filled.

They are filled with wonder at the simple things. They have such a way of reminding us of innocence lost... bringing us back to an appreciation of the things that are truly important.

They have a unique perspective, one that we lose as adults and it's good to be reminded of. A child's innate ability to accept others as they are, naturally nurture someone who's hurting, and express themselves without fear of embarrassment is an inspiration.

As a mother, there's also just no way to explain the bond that comes from a life growing inside of you, feeling that baby move, and then giving birth to and nursing him or her.... it's just a bond that no-one can ever recreate or take away.

You pour your life into your kids. It is the most difficult, frustrating, challenging, and sometimes painful thing you'll ever do. BUT, when your child says "I love you" or "thank you, Mom" or when you see your children struggling, yet succeeding, or contributing to society in a positive way, it's this overwhelming feeling that yes... you've done something very good. But even when they don't do those things, there is just a basic instinctual love for this person who is a part of you or who you've invested so much time and part of who you are into. Because whether they are your blood or they are adopted, children are a part of you.
SW-User
@BlueDiver I think that's true on both accounts. I actually thought about saying exactly that... that you just can't understand it (the bond) until you've got it... but I didn't think you'd accept that answer, lol. So I did my best to describe it. 😏
BlueDiver · 36-40, M
You should really read the Shadow Quartet by Orson Scott Card - the second book has one of the most poignant explanations for it that I've ever read (and fyi, the comment 400 pixels above this one also has one of the other most poignant explanations for it that I've ever read)
SW-User
@BlueDiver Oh yeah... I need to add that to my reading list! Thanks. 😊
Kids are a whole world unto themselves and they are the future .. Maybe its vain to want to have them.. Idk whereas some people see them as a money pit or an infinite time hog of their life ..

I see them as the epitome of life and love itself

I used to want to be a mom so bad and i used to think i'd be a great one.. I wanted the cutest smartest nicest kids too

I guess thats vain

I dont know what to think about anything anymore

There's so much fuckery in the world nowadays or maybe always

Sometimes im glad i dont have kids so they will never know misery

Im just glad that some nice people somewhere have happy kids

Wherever they are

I just give up on ever being one of them

(Sorry for using your post to rant .. Im just like deeply miserable today.. )
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You said it : i don't want kids. So you'll reject whatever people trying to say
BlueDiver · 36-40, M
Why would not wanting kids make me reject people's explanations of why having kids is worthwhile? I'm not looking to be convinced - I'm looking to understand. I'll reject the former, yeah, but I'll listen to the latter. Otherwise why would I bother asking the question.

 
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