I Want To Talk About Parenting

Has anyone ever seen the movie Megan is missing? I mean I have, and I know it's super early but my husband and I are contemplating on whether or not we should show it to our daughter when she's older and starts using the internet and social media. We will be consulting professionals and stuff, but I want to know what actual parents think? Like, hubby and i know it'll upset her, but looking at the dangers that exists and things that happen, I'd rather scare her into being safe, than worry about her feelings and risk something happening to her. I at least would like her to be 100% aware of what could happen and who could be on the other end of a conversation, and give her those tools to use. I'm sure you guys get what I'm trying to say here, but what do you guys think? I would really like to know what other moms and dads think?

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greenmountaingal · 70-79, F

I have seen some of this movie. It is a bad movie! It is sensationalistic, titillating to potential sadistic child predators, and generally not very helpful for what you are trying to do.

If you consult professionals about this, they will no doubt lead you to some much better films.

One book that would be very helpful for you, and eventually for your daughter, would be The Gift of Fear by Gavin DeBecker. Read it and then summarize the warning signs of a bad or potentially dangerous person for your daughter when she is old enough. One good family project would be to memorize the warning signs together. DeBecker teaches that tuning in to our own natural fear instincts (instead of being terrified of every possible publicized danger) is a healthy way to stay alive and well.

Early is better than late when it comes to discussing the Internet or other similar hazards. But scaring kids has many bad implications. Don't scare her; educate her and also carefully monitor her use of the media.

Brookie101 · 31-35, F

Thanks. I appreciate your insight, it really is helpful, the more insight I have the better of a decision I can make for her, am for I'm sure your right about the psychologists too, I just worry about her. @greenmountaingal

greenmountaingal · 70-79, F

@Brookie101 De Becker also wrote a book aimed at parents. You might want to read his book and check out his website.

frequentlyme · 70-79, M

We all want our children to be safe; but, and this is only my opinion, showing a child a movie isn't the way to go about doing it. Personally I think until they are old enough (mature enough) to make their own decisions (varies with each child), you need to monitor their usage of all devices connected to the internet, and have open, frank, but carefully worded discussions with them. If a child feels safe in talking with you, your chances of guiding them safely through childhood is much higher. It's when they feel unsafe discussing things with you, or when they learn from others, that you begin to ahve problems.

Brookie101 · 31-35, F

I really appreciate you giving me your opinion on the matter. Like i told the other person, the more points of views i have the better of a decision I can make as a mom @frequentlyme

frequentlyme · 70-79, M

@Brookie101 In the end, only you and your husband know what you are comfortable with, and what you think is best for your child. What I do for sure, is open communication in an environment where a child feels safe (not judged, loved, feeling their parents want their communication and respect them), is paramount. This is a vastly more complicated world filled with perils not imagined even 20 years ago. I admire you for trying to seek varied ideas and opinions.

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