My mom is driving me nuts and so is my dad

She goes through my things without my permission and takes out camisoles/size large shell tops that she says no longer fit me and takes them and puts them in a bag. She takes my clothes to wash when I just had used them and they aren’t dirty yet and puts them to wash without my permission. I will put my clothes and bras and camisoles to wash when I feel they need to be washed. I change my panties everyday though. My mom and dad constantly make comments on what I wear and never shut up about it. They say no one else is dressed like me and I need to exert more common sense in how I dress. They say I dress too warmly and bundled up for August and give me disapproving looks when I went out today in a warm mid weight coat and thick scarf over my thick sweater, jeans, camisole shell top, bra, and underwear and lighter socks and combat boots today. It was 80 degrees today with the exception of Fall River MA on weather bug being 75-76 degrees though it was supposed to be lower 80s. They have to be breathing down my neck about the way I dress and they don’t respect my right to bodily autonomy without having to hear their criticism. Luckily, the people running the recovery connection center and the people that come in aren’t so rude and said nothing about the way I was dressed although I was complimented on having a silk flower in my hair. I think they know better than to say something and keep their opinions to themselves which I appreciate. My family does not respect my individuality about how I am dressed and my mom when she is busy at work does not go through my dressers and take stuff out. I told her I didn’t give her permission to go through my dressers but she did it anyway. Now I don’t know where perfectly good wide strapped colorful shell tops and camisoles are because I found them in the bag in the downstairs closet before and put them back in my drawer and she came in and asked me what I put away. I put away my camisoles and black underwear. She took them out again and hid them on me and I kept asking her where did she put them? I have only like four going our camisoles and my mother is going to get me more but I don’t appreciate her cleaning out my drawers without me agreeing. I have camisoles I wear for home.my mom said I was a pig for wearing the same camisoles days in a row and underclothes ( with the exception of my underwear) house camisoles and clothes that I used that came into contact with my skin. I think my camisoles for me were fine and my mom said they were stretched out and said I wasn’t a large.she said there was no need to wear things that didn’t fit because we don’t live in poverty and I could buy new ones on Amazon or at kohls or something. I wish my parents would just leave me alone in certain things and stop trying to dictate how I should dress and my mom would stop going through my stuff. I am going to be 34 years old. I may be mentally disabled but I don’t like being treated like a child that can’t decide for herself what she needs when it comes to trivial matters like my clothing. And I want my space respected. It is my room and my parents have the mentality that it is their house so they can do what they want. It drives me nuts. My mom shouldn’t just come in and take my things even if she told me she was going to and I said she was not because I want to keep my stuff. I know most people would say well I need to move out but I don’t have anywhere else to go and I am not ready to fully take care of myself. The waiting list for low income housing takes years too. It’s just little things like this and I’m sure she threw out my Sherpa lined house socks one pair of them because they had holes on the outside from being used even though the lining was still good and they were warm for my feet on a freezing sixty something degree days and lower 70s. My family have expectations that I maintain a certain level of cleanliness and they are enforcing these rules. I hate having rules enforced on me. My mom complained that my therapist wouldn’t see her for a few minutes to explain what goes on at home because I am an adult and she is threatening to call my therapist to report my issues with clothing and wanting to bring that up in therapy again. She thinks the team at DMH do nothing to help me even though I am the one responsible for taking their suggestions. Like my therapist suggested to prepare for more independence that I clean the house and learn to cook and grocery shop and personal shop for myself. I want my parents to leave me alone about my clothing and buzz off about the trivial things. My mom says if I don’t like the rules or expectations of cleanliness that I have options. I can always talk to my department of mental health team about finding another place to live. My sister said my therapist sounded like a dick. My therapist is actually very nice. My mom also tried to take away my cell phone away for a few of hours for not using nair on my legs to get rid of very coarse long leg hair because I haven’t shaved in like two years before I saw my primary care physician. My dad and sister took her side and said it was just a hygiene thing. My parents also tried to tell me my cell phone should be placed in a spot away from me so I’m not on my phone after 11 or 12 am and take it away from me and give it back to me in the morning.. they forgot about that and I let them forget. Though my parents are not controlling on most things there are trivial things they do not accept and impose their will on me. Now they will go through my clothes to make sure my underclothes like my camisoles are put to wash everyday. I hate being in my parents house sometimes. Leave me alone on these small things that don’t matter. I’m in my 30s. And they said that I am going to have my room cleaned and all the papers on my desk from my proofreading course will be thrown out or in recycle bin because I’m not using them or finishing my course. and the mess and hoarding in my room will be cleaned out. I have a couple of bags on the floor including my two of my knitting bags. I have sketchpads on top of my desk. I have composition notebooks on my desk and I like my room as is. I just need to clean it and put everything back in its place. My parents care too much about trivial things that don’t matter. I’m going back to my courses at some point. I feel like a naughty child when they say this stuff to me., I want my parents to butt out of how I keep my room, how I dress, and wearing the same clothes for a couple of days before putting it to wash. It is infuriating. I curse having mental disabilities and low motivation. I should have learned to take care of myself long ago so I could live as an adult and not have to put up with this aggravation. I sound like a whiny young adolescent when I’m just about to turn 34. Because it is their house, it is their rules and if I don’t like it I can leave except I have nowhere to go. My dad let me renew my license but I can’t drive. I’m not on any insurance for the cars and if I became more functional than maybe there is a chance I could drive again. I wish I could afford to live on my own but rents and mortgages are too expensive. And also moving residences will be a pain in the ass. I just wish I could find a free rent for work exchange situation or move somewhere really cheap where making $2000 to $4000 per month was enough to live comfortably. If I finish my vocational courses and higher education, I could eventually make that much. If I worked more hours I could make even more.. I would need to land a remote flexible job/career though such as in proofreading and editing, translation and transcription, writing and blogging , etc. Right now though I’m only on disability benefits which are only a few hundred dollars per month about $700 a month. That’s better than nothing but it’s still not enough to live off of. I really screwed up my life and now am being monitored on the small things by my parents about my clothes and how much I wear, and when I put my things to wash. It’s infuriating. I know if I acted like an adult and had the responsibilities of an adult and was self sufficient and independent my parents would no longer have control over me. They think it’s just looking out for my best interest but what they are is irritating.