My family is critical and controlling when it comes to how I dress
My dad asked me if I wasn’t warm with a faux fur scarf in the house and handwarmers and why didn’t I take them off? Because I felt like wearing a thick woolen head wrap/earwarmer , faux fur scarf, and hand warmers on top of my thermals corduroy leggings, double socks, wool sweater, two fleeces to keep warm. I am sick of stupid comments and questions about my clothing. So Tuesday my mother took me to the dentist. It was only 60-65 degrees outside so it was still very cold but tolerably cold. Because I was wearing underwear, camisole, bra, thermal shirts and leggings, woolly thick sweater, fleece lined leggings, double woolly socks, corduroy pants, a woolen jacket in between, a faux fur/shearling coat on top, thick woolly scarf, woolen hat, and fleece thermotech gloves and I put a my coat hood on top of my head outside and was wearing it in the car.and she said I now needed mid season coats because winter coats were no longer appropriate for the season. She was rambling on and on about how there was no difference to how I was dressed Tuesday and it being like 20 degrees outside in the middle of the winter. Telling me the way I was dressed was inappropriate and too heavy for the weather. She said to me how she was embarrassed to be out with me in public because of how I dressed and that she was tired of seeing the elbow nudges and stares of people as they looked at me. I told her to be quiet and to get over how I dressed. And she wanted me to put down my hood on in the car. I said I don’t want to hear this anymore. She kept asking me why are you wearing your hood in the car when you already have a hat on? I said I just felt like wearing it and that was all. She said people do everything for a reason and kept bugging me. She told me when she goes into these offices she loves how people just stare at me sarcastically. She said schizophrenics used to be locked up in the house like animals do you know what people used to do with schizophrenics? We get to the dentists office and she was telling me immediately to take off my gloves as soon as I got in. I kept them on for as long as I felt like. I would take my stuff off when I went for my cleaning. My dental hygienist said she liked my coat and it looked so cozy and pretty. I said thank you. The hygienist was friendly and asked me if i did anything fun yesterday. I said well when i got home i was probably going to read a book. I told her I have read up to three- four books in two weeks. She said she started a book but it’s been put on the back burner for now. I told her titles of historical fiction books I have been reading. As she was preparing me she asked if I watched any good tv shows. I said I watched Aladdin live action, wicked, chronicles of marina on Amazon prime movies. So I took my x rays and went with my cleaning. My regular hygienist Louise was out on maternity leave so Courtney was my hygienist Tuesday . I got my cleaning I let her pick my flavor of toothpaste anything but bubblegum. Dr. Bui came in to see after and checked my mouth. I told them I got my wisdom teeth taken out on the 6th of March. One comment when she saw my hat and warm scarf still on was it cold outside. Because she hadn’t been out in the afternoon yet. I said it was like 60 degrees. But I wanted to say of course it’s cold outside it’s only the 60s, what kind of a stupid question is that?
I let that stupid question slide.I made my next. Appointment for early October. I was putting my stuff back on and my mom asked me once we got to the car to take off my hood I said it was fine and I was keeping my hood on. My mother was like I can feel the heat coming from you and I don’t know how you aren’t breaking out in sweat and burning. My mom was driving to and she told me I could have returned my books yesterday since we were already nearby the library. That’s the only right thing that she said yesterday instead of waiting for Monday when they were due and I could have renewed the one I was still reading and pick up some new books. She continued to hound me about my clothing. And compared me to wearing what I feel like with her just doing whatever she feels like. Say she didn’t feel like grocery shopping, cooking or cleaning. She was spending her day off doing errands and taking me to an appointment. She lives with three other adults a they should be left to figure it out. Say she wanted to feel like maintaining her flexibility. She told me to put my hood down and I was just ignoring her. She said it’s really your way or the highway isn’t it? I have never seen anyone so thick skulled. No matter how many times someone talks to you. She said look around do you see anyone dressed like you are? And I said it is not my problem. And she told me if I was going to Easter lunch on Sunday she better not see any thick hats, scarves, and gloves or otherwise I would not go with her. She can already see it everyone with their summery dresses and there you are. she threatened to take my cold weather accessories and cold weather coats and get rid of them. She then proceeded to trying to yank my scarf off of me but I kept her from doing that. She yanked my favorite Italian wool hat off my head and flung it on the parking lot next to our car and I called her a fucking bitch and I went out to retrieve it. She opened her door and I couldn’t see it any more on the ground where it landed. I demanded to know where my hat was! I thought she picked it up and was hiding it on me. I demanded she give me my hat back. She said she didn’t have it and she flung it out further when she opened the door. I was this close to punching her in the face. She yelled get in the car or I’m leaving you here to figure out another way to get home. Fucking crazy bitch. I got the car and kept telling her to give me my hat back. She said before she went to Shaw’s to drop me off home or go with her. I said home. I was fuming with rage and wanted to beat her up.when we pulled into the driveway I told her to give me my hat back immediately. She said she didn’t have it and give it up. I said I’m not leaving until you give me back my hat. She. Started moving the car with the door open in the driveway. When I got inside I was so aggravated that I started crying. My dad asked me why I didn’t. Go to shaws with mom. I told him about her behavior. And went upstairs. I used the bathroom and went for a walk. Later when it was getting close to getting dark and I was coming back. My dad found me up the street and told me he wouldn’t tolerate name calling just because you are angry with someone. Of course take her side. Your mom is in a bad place there will be no more talk of this tonight. My parents texted me that my mom put my hat back in my room and had it the whole time.😡😡😡😡 my dad also made it very clear that I was to take off my scarf hat and coat at the table if I came to Easter lunch or otherwise don’t bother going. That’s the choice. Or if I do come and I don’t dress and act according to their stipulations they would walk out and leave with me. Fucking control freaks!!!! I said what happened to accepting your kids the way they are? I meant how I dressed. My sister of course took their side. She was like they do accept you they don’t make you work. You don’t contribute anything, and they haven’t kicked you out.
Also my mother was up my butt about being wearing hand warmers at the table ( they were not dirty and I was eating with a fork and knife.) she said on days she is isn’t home she can’t do anything but if she’s around at the table to take them off or I won’t eat. Excuse me? My point is when it comes to stuff that doesn’t matter like what how I dress it shouldn’t be a big deal. My sister said it would be like her going out in a tank top and shorts in 30 degrees and no coat. Wouldn’t you say something? Honestly? My parents clearly do not accept me as I am or respect me as a 33 year old to make my own choices on how I dress. I feel like I am infantilized and patronized to when it comes to this issue. My sister even told me her friends asked her if I had cancer two summers ago at her graduation party because I was dressed more warmly than others. How rude and obnoxious.. I can’t believe this is a fucking issue!!!! I am skipping out on Easter lunch. Because take me as I am or don’t bother me. You would think I behaved badly or something but no it’s all because of fucking clothing and then trying to control what I wear all under the guise of worrying about your health. What a stupid family. Get a life and worry about more important things. My mother and father tell me I have an obsession with clothing and food. And my father said to me have I ever called you names when I was angry with you? Um YES!!! Buffoon, retard, misfit etc. sometimes I really hate my family when it comes to these issues. I ate dinner with my mom in the kitchen downstairs and didn’t say excuse to open the cabinet around her face. She said say excuse me this fucking bitch has a face you know. No apologies for earlier or no taking back their stupid stipulations. If my family does not accept the way I dress, then they don’t accept me for who I am. They do not control me in most aspects, but this is one aspect where they will not give it a rest. I had my robe hood on inside yesterday and my dad told me I wore it inside when it wasn’t cold because I was just being weird. Everything with the way I dress to my family is unacceptable and weird. And my sister asked me why I had a hood on my head too. This is one aspect if life where my family gets on my last nerve.
I let that stupid question slide.I made my next. Appointment for early October. I was putting my stuff back on and my mom asked me once we got to the car to take off my hood I said it was fine and I was keeping my hood on. My mother was like I can feel the heat coming from you and I don’t know how you aren’t breaking out in sweat and burning. My mom was driving to and she told me I could have returned my books yesterday since we were already nearby the library. That’s the only right thing that she said yesterday instead of waiting for Monday when they were due and I could have renewed the one I was still reading and pick up some new books. She continued to hound me about my clothing. And compared me to wearing what I feel like with her just doing whatever she feels like. Say she didn’t feel like grocery shopping, cooking or cleaning. She was spending her day off doing errands and taking me to an appointment. She lives with three other adults a they should be left to figure it out. Say she wanted to feel like maintaining her flexibility. She told me to put my hood down and I was just ignoring her. She said it’s really your way or the highway isn’t it? I have never seen anyone so thick skulled. No matter how many times someone talks to you. She said look around do you see anyone dressed like you are? And I said it is not my problem. And she told me if I was going to Easter lunch on Sunday she better not see any thick hats, scarves, and gloves or otherwise I would not go with her. She can already see it everyone with their summery dresses and there you are. she threatened to take my cold weather accessories and cold weather coats and get rid of them. She then proceeded to trying to yank my scarf off of me but I kept her from doing that. She yanked my favorite Italian wool hat off my head and flung it on the parking lot next to our car and I called her a fucking bitch and I went out to retrieve it. She opened her door and I couldn’t see it any more on the ground where it landed. I demanded to know where my hat was! I thought she picked it up and was hiding it on me. I demanded she give me my hat back. She said she didn’t have it and she flung it out further when she opened the door. I was this close to punching her in the face. She yelled get in the car or I’m leaving you here to figure out another way to get home. Fucking crazy bitch. I got the car and kept telling her to give me my hat back. She said before she went to Shaw’s to drop me off home or go with her. I said home. I was fuming with rage and wanted to beat her up.when we pulled into the driveway I told her to give me my hat back immediately. She said she didn’t have it and give it up. I said I’m not leaving until you give me back my hat. She. Started moving the car with the door open in the driveway. When I got inside I was so aggravated that I started crying. My dad asked me why I didn’t. Go to shaws with mom. I told him about her behavior. And went upstairs. I used the bathroom and went for a walk. Later when it was getting close to getting dark and I was coming back. My dad found me up the street and told me he wouldn’t tolerate name calling just because you are angry with someone. Of course take her side. Your mom is in a bad place there will be no more talk of this tonight. My parents texted me that my mom put my hat back in my room and had it the whole time.😡😡😡😡 my dad also made it very clear that I was to take off my scarf hat and coat at the table if I came to Easter lunch or otherwise don’t bother going. That’s the choice. Or if I do come and I don’t dress and act according to their stipulations they would walk out and leave with me. Fucking control freaks!!!! I said what happened to accepting your kids the way they are? I meant how I dressed. My sister of course took their side. She was like they do accept you they don’t make you work. You don’t contribute anything, and they haven’t kicked you out.
Also my mother was up my butt about being wearing hand warmers at the table ( they were not dirty and I was eating with a fork and knife.) she said on days she is isn’t home she can’t do anything but if she’s around at the table to take them off or I won’t eat. Excuse me? My point is when it comes to stuff that doesn’t matter like what how I dress it shouldn’t be a big deal. My sister said it would be like her going out in a tank top and shorts in 30 degrees and no coat. Wouldn’t you say something? Honestly? My parents clearly do not accept me as I am or respect me as a 33 year old to make my own choices on how I dress. I feel like I am infantilized and patronized to when it comes to this issue. My sister even told me her friends asked her if I had cancer two summers ago at her graduation party because I was dressed more warmly than others. How rude and obnoxious.. I can’t believe this is a fucking issue!!!! I am skipping out on Easter lunch. Because take me as I am or don’t bother me. You would think I behaved badly or something but no it’s all because of fucking clothing and then trying to control what I wear all under the guise of worrying about your health. What a stupid family. Get a life and worry about more important things. My mother and father tell me I have an obsession with clothing and food. And my father said to me have I ever called you names when I was angry with you? Um YES!!! Buffoon, retard, misfit etc. sometimes I really hate my family when it comes to these issues. I ate dinner with my mom in the kitchen downstairs and didn’t say excuse to open the cabinet around her face. She said say excuse me this fucking bitch has a face you know. No apologies for earlier or no taking back their stupid stipulations. If my family does not accept the way I dress, then they don’t accept me for who I am. They do not control me in most aspects, but this is one aspect where they will not give it a rest. I had my robe hood on inside yesterday and my dad told me I wore it inside when it wasn’t cold because I was just being weird. Everything with the way I dress to my family is unacceptable and weird. And my sister asked me why I had a hood on my head too. This is one aspect if life where my family gets on my last nerve.
31-35, F
