I hate myself

Its so funny that your own family gaslights you and when you get frustrated they start blaming you

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I'm sorry they treat u that way. U shouldn't hate urself, but just hate the way they make u feel about urself.
U can't control how others treat u, but u can control them having access to ur life and being allowed to make u have self doubt and self loathing. Remove urself from their reach. Choose to be around people who love and care about u.