You do get a choice of who your family is.

I never thought of my dad's or my mom's side of the family as my family, just my parents family and I feel bad that I don't care. The only family I grew up with is my dad, and my dad has been gone for 5 years now. Now I just have my marriage parter and our child that's who I considered my family. Not the ones that didn't want to even try to get to know me and the ones that gave up on me because I was suicidal and self harming. My family is my dad, my partner and my child. That's all I need anyway.