my cousin thinks her dog is more important than my kids lol

my cousin is throwing a fit because I told her we can’t dog sit for her dog this year. We have done it every year for 6 years but with a new, surprise, baby still recovering from opioid addiction, looking after a dog is a big no from me

She blew up on me over the phone this morning and told me my kids have replaced her dog and I clearly don’t love him like I used to

OBVIOUSLY my kids are more important than your dog!!! omfg

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hippyjoe1955 · 70-79, M

You take in foster children?

seana · 26-30, F

@hippyjoe1955 no they are my MILs children, and also my dads. Super long story but my husband and I started dating as teenagers and then our parents got together and had kids. But my MIL became an addict and my dad is violent and mentally unstable. Hence we have the girls

hippyjoe1955 · 70-79, M

@seana So sad for the baby(s) when their mom is addicted like that. So glad that you are able and willing to look after them.

seana · 26-30, F

@hippyjoe1955 yes luckily she wasn’t on drugs until after the first 2 were born. But this poor baby had zero pre natal care and a lot of heroin. MIL couldnt give a shit either, she suggested naming her “Poppy” for a joke

hippyjoe1955 · 70-79, M

@seana That is so sad as to be sick. A friend of mine fosters children most of which are born to mothers who are addicts. The babies are so afflicted by its mother's choices the baby will never lead a normal life. I hope the wee one you are taking care of does not suffer that fate.

seana · 26-30, F

@hippyjoe1955 it is so sad and horrific watching these babies detox. So far she’s improved a lot but she has problems with sleeping and body temperature. We will know when she’s older if there are other issues but we have been told to expect possible developmental delays. They don’t think she’s an extreme case though which gives me hope

hippyjoe1955 · 70-79, M

@seana Sometimes it is hard to be compassionate toward the addict when you see the results of her addiction in her children.

seana · 26-30, F

@hippyjoe1955 it’s a daily struggle for my husband as he has pretty strong feelings of hatred towards her. I try not to give her much of my energy. To me my dad is worse.

hippyjoe1955 · 70-79, M

@seana Addiction and its enablers are something that is hard to deal with. Do you unconditionally give them what they need to survive or do you at some point say 'enough' and deny them the food and shelter they need so they don't spend all their money on their 'hobby'. It truly is a hard choice to make but the one thing you have to do is keep yourself separate from them emotionally of they will use you like a rented car. Fast and furious and they don't care what condition you are in.