I Have Done Things I Am Not Proud of

I could go into detail but as sad as I am at the moment I don't want to feel hated right now. I just need a shoulder to cry on which is something I dont get so often. I know it is always someone doing as worse as me but I'm not a bad person. I just try to do what makes me happy which in some cases hurt others. I smoke marijuana every morning and night to try and alleviate all those pains and bad memories. I don't want anyone feeling sorry for me which is why I never say how I feel especially my deep dark secrets. I know there's plenty of people that feel the same as I do do please I'm here to listen as well as share