many years ago, my daughter died, age 3 days

my wife having cancer.

1. My date broke things off with me before we even started datiing, I think he was using me as a boost for when he felt low. He left me to 'focus on himself'.
As a person who has been through a lot of abusive and damaging relationships and has never really felt 'the spark',,it was painful to see a guy that I finally like, leave. He was my dream, and I really felt proud of myself because I learnt how to be happy alone and I finally waited for the right person he was that person but it seems nowlt.

2. My dad confessed that he wishes he could live in his home country and he is only here so we don't die. He pretends to care about me all of my life and I struggle alone everyday. He is a nice man but that's all really, I have given up on forcing him to care about me when I give him so much love and attention. Honestly, I would rather not have a father. This is probably why I have had so many bad relationships in the past, lots of issues from not being cared about/rejected.

3. My best friend is sort of left me because she has a boyfriend now but I am happy for her so Im not complaining

4. I came to the realisation that I have no friends, only aquaintances. I am mostly an option.

5. I sort of want to just. Dissapear right now. I smoked my lungs out this afternoon, had too much sugar on an empty stomach and now I have a bad headache from it so studying for my final exams is difficult.
I am tempted to go out and buy some pringles, a bottle of coke, and maybe some chocolate too, try and suck it up and keep going.

Splitting up with my ex and having a breakdown

My daughters death

Being bullied

Probably the abuse I suffered from my ex wife I truly adored her and to see her turn into what she did truly destroyed me

nothing comes to mind

my ex gf breaking up with me last year was kinda lame