Unemployment and job hunting
In your opinion or perspective, can you explain why most people look down at you, judge, and make you feel bad when you’re unemployed, job hunting, and interviewing?
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TeresaRudolph71 · 51-55, F
I haven't experienced much of that from people who are still of working age (though there was one person who seemed to wonder why I was out of a job). Most of the people who have looked down on me for being unemployed have been older people (probably from the World War II generation, aka "The Greatest Generation"), who have long since retired. They got jobs during a time when it was much easier to get a job, and the process was much simpler and more straightforward. Many of them worked the same job throughout the entire course of their careers, or at least worked for the same company, perhaps getting promoted a couple of times.
These people have no idea what it's like to have to look for a job now. They seem to assume that it's just as easy now as it was then, and that anyone who is unemployed for more than a few weeks must just be lazy or have something the matter with them. I think most of that generation has died off now, but there are still probably a few left. I don't know how many people younger than that feel that way. Perhaps some do. They just don't know what it's like to have to get a new job now.
These people have no idea what it's like to have to look for a job now. They seem to assume that it's just as easy now as it was then, and that anyone who is unemployed for more than a few weeks must just be lazy or have something the matter with them. I think most of that generation has died off now, but there are still probably a few left. I don't know how many people younger than that feel that way. Perhaps some do. They just don't know what it's like to have to get a new job now.
Cat05 · 36-40, F
@TeresaRudolph71 yes, and I think some do. It’s strange personally with me- most men humbly share their experiences with me of struggling to find a job or making it in their industries whereas the women look down at me, judge, and comment on my career situation. This happened with a friend at her birthday dinner last night. She does have everything in her life and has what she wants. She came from a wealthy family in Sri Lanka. I never saw this side of her till now. I was shocked and never expected her to do such a thing.
TeresaRudolph71 · 51-55, F
@Cat05 Wow, I'm sorry to hear that you had such an experience with a friend. It's hard sometimes to see a side of someone that we never knew was there. It sounds like she probably has no idea what it's like to have to struggle, because she has always had a wealthy family to back her up.
I also think it's interesting that women have looked down on you more than men have. I've actually had that experience too, with some women. I once read an interesting article about a related subject, on the LinkedIn website. Apparently women are more fiercely competitive with each other because there still aren't as many places at the table for them as there are for men, at least according to the article. Of course, this may depend on the industry. But it seems like men tend to be more secure, at least as far as their careers are concerned. They are often more willing to help women out, with sensible advice, encouragement, and empathy when it's needed, at least in that area. I'm sure there's some psychological reason for this. Maybe it's because some women who have managed to claw their way up think, if I can manage this, even though I'm a woman myself, why can't other women? I don't know if that's the way they think, but perhaps some do.
I also think it's interesting that women have looked down on you more than men have. I've actually had that experience too, with some women. I once read an interesting article about a related subject, on the LinkedIn website. Apparently women are more fiercely competitive with each other because there still aren't as many places at the table for them as there are for men, at least according to the article. Of course, this may depend on the industry. But it seems like men tend to be more secure, at least as far as their careers are concerned. They are often more willing to help women out, with sensible advice, encouragement, and empathy when it's needed, at least in that area. I'm sure there's some psychological reason for this. Maybe it's because some women who have managed to claw their way up think, if I can manage this, even though I'm a woman myself, why can't other women? I don't know if that's the way they think, but perhaps some do.
Cat05 · 36-40, F
Then I honestly think it’s bullsh*t of women to act like they’re “supportive” and “collaborative” with each other as women, lol... considering the #metoomovement. No offense! Lol. Sorry, that article that you mentioned baffles me because it’s so sad that women can be more fiercely competitive. Ridiculous. I guess I should just be around men then. Less stress and hair pulling. 😹😹😹@TeresaRudolph71
TeresaRudolph71 · 51-55, F
@Cat05 Haha yes, I agree that it's probably rather rare to find women who are truly supportive and collaborative, especially at the same company or in the same industry. Some are, but not all. Yes, definitely watch out. You wouldn't want to find yourself in a nasty catfight.