My advice is simple.
If you weren't invited in a timely manner don't go. (Personally I require at least a months notice for a large event or reception ... but that's me)
Save the money you will have spent on going and buy yourself a favorite take-out and a dessert on the way home from work.
Logic: You'll get paid for working and you'll save a ton on the cost of going (hair, nails, dress, shoes, gift).
			
			
			
			
			
		If you weren't invited in a timely manner don't go. (Personally I require at least a months notice for a large event or reception ... but that's me)
Save the money you will have spent on going and buy yourself a favorite take-out and a dessert on the way home from work.
Logic: You'll get paid for working and you'll save a ton on the cost of going (hair, nails, dress, shoes, gift).
View 1 more replies »
@Mellowgirl 
Thanks!
Feel free to use my line: "Thanks for thinking of me, but I have a conflicting commitment."
			
			
			
			
			
		 I like your thinking 
Thanks!
Feel free to use my line: "Thanks for thinking of me, but I have a conflicting commitment."
			Mellowgirl · 31-35, F			
		
		@Threepio would it be rude of me to email her and her mother or would it be better if I let the message go the route it came. Through my mother?
			
			
			
			
			
		@Mellowgirl If there was no RSVP and it wasn't a formal invitation, I would think an e-mail to the bride only would suffice. Just keep it short, simple and drama free ... IE "Thanks for thinking of me, but I have a conflicting commitment."
			
			
			
			
			
		
			Poppies · 61-69, F			
		
		It could be that someone has said they can't come and they have extra space.  You could feel insulted about it or you could shrug and figure, "that happens."  The question is, do you want to go despite the inconvenience and expense?  If you think you would enjoy it, go.  If you don't want to go, then don't.  You don't have to please anyone else.
			
			
			
			
			
		
			Mellowgirl · 31-35, F			
		
		@Poppies she was invited to the wedding the first time round. She was also updated to know it would be happening once things start to open again. I didn't know this until we spoke today. So she knew for two years.
			
			
			
			
			
		
			Poppies · 61-69, F			
		
		@Mellowgirl it's not surprising if some of the people they originally invited still don't feel it's safe to go, or find these new updated arrangements don't fit their lives for other reasons.  It still comes down to, is it worth it to you?  What will bother you more, missing this opportunity or going through all the effort to fit it into your life?
			
			
			
			
			
		
			Mellowgirl · 31-35, F			
		
		@Poppies Going through all the effort to fit it into my life.
			
			
			
			
			
		
			RedBaron · M			
		
		What difference does it make? Go if you want to, don't if you don't.
			
			
			
			
			
		
			Mellowgirl · 31-35, F			
		
		@RedBaron not a slight, reoccurring
			
			
			
			
			
		
			RedBaron · M			
		
		@Mellowgirl Whatever you want to call it.
			
			
			
			
			
		
			
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			LucyFuhr · 56-60, F			
		
		I get what you're saying but it's CHAMPAGNE and CAKE.
They could invite me halfway through the party and I'd still show up for those 😂
			
			
			
			
			
		They could invite me halfway through the party and I'd still show up for those 😂
			Mellowgirl · 31-35, F			
		
		@LucyFuhr I don't drink alcohol attending would only annoy people for asking for orange juice
			
			
			
			
			
		
			toddr13 · 46-50, M			
		
		If you're too busy and can't get ready, why put yourself through the stress?  Just politely send your regrets and wish them well.
			
			
			
			
			
		
			Mellowgirl · 31-35, F			
		
		@toddr13 I told my mum no since I wasn't personally invited
			
			
			
			
			
		
			toddr13 · 46-50, M			
		
		@Mellowgirl That's a good option.  Don't let them stress your day over it.
			
			
			
			
			
		
			SW-User			
		
		Depends on what you have going on, but I wouldn't personally think so.
			
			
			
			
			
		
			Mellowgirl · 31-35, F			
		
		@SW-User I work Wednesdays.(would find it hard to book time off) I'm also in my final year of university. I haven't got anything to wear. I haven't had my hair done in over a year!
Gaining weight also makes it hard to get ready last minute.
And a gift hmm...
I don't drink alcohol
			
			
			
			
			
		Gaining weight also makes it hard to get ready last minute.
And a gift hmm...
I don't drink alcohol
			Mrsbetweenfatandfit · 31-35, F			
		
		Uh I guess if you already have plans maybe
			
			
			
			
			
		
			Mellowgirl · 31-35, F			
		
		@Mrsbetweenfatandfit I work in the week, I'm completely a degree. I have been in lockdown so have nothing to wear, not had my hair done for over a year!
I don't drink alcohol!
You know!
			
			
			
			
			
		I don't drink alcohol!
You know!
			Mrsbetweenfatandfit · 31-35, F			
		
		@Mellowgirl well if you feel like getting out even in an outfit from last year could be good. But if it’s only more stressful then skip this one
			
			
			
			
			
		
			Mellowgirl · 31-35, F			
		
		@Mrsbetweenfatandfit I wish I could fit my old clothes size 8 top-10bottoms to now 12 bottoms -14 tops
Grieving really packs in the pounds
			
			
			
			
			
		Grieving really packs in the pounds







