I remember how cold it used to be

At 6 am in December. Every day since I broke down for the final time and hit rock bottom, I woke up without fail to start doing exam questions with my study partner. We would study till midday. Then take an hour's break. Study again till evening. Take another hour's break and then study till 10pm. I put in my last bit of energy into this. It felt so rewarding at the end of the day. I wish I could go back to being this productive. Depression and hence being nonfunctional is really making me very anxious. There is so much I need to study before my next exam. And being anxious is further paralyzing me.