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It’s usually the the things she’s interested in and how she dresses. It’s similar to a guy’s look and interests. They’re not considered to be the things most girls would be interested in or how they would dress. As to why she’d be considered a Tom “boy”, similar to a girly girl. Someone who’s considered to be more feminine than the average girl. They’re just titles that has a lot to do with their interests more than anything. I was considered a tomboy growing up. I never wanted to wear dresses or much of anything associated with girls. 😂