I know it's the stupid idea. Why the hell not?

So. Despite gonna away for while from her after she blocked me. After 6months of no communication i emailed her asking how she is. I don't expect a reply. But weirdly it makes me happy. It makes do all good stuff. While planning an action to travel and meet her drastically helped or helps to take good actions. Suddenly i want to start working on my body, eating good food, listing to knowledgeable stuff reading books. It has helped me. I don't crave alcohol or any other stupid things when I have a thought. Ok weirdly i didn't think about her for last 3 months but it's quite interesting that I get conscious and my actions are more real when I have idea of that i should travel and go to meet her for real. 🙃🙂😃