I think part of what makes me anxious about moving is that it's going to show me who I am.

@BlueVeins Yes, you do, but that’s okay. I have been a salary man for almost 30 years but had a family to support. I’d never do this for decades otherwise.

@Fukfacewillie What would you do otherwise then?

@BlueVeins Work independently and invest in passive income opportunities. Build wealth over time. Avoid the salary trap.

@greensnacks so what you're saying is you have to stay until I accept it

I can use this

@BlueVeins I'm going to bed

@greensnacks im coming with you

@CrazyMusicLover Do you still play it safe? You are still young.

@BlueVeins Yeah, I still do. I don't even know what exactly I want anymore.

I know I am young but socially I don't feel young and actually feel like it's too late for a lot of things for me. Internally, I can't blend in with young people who go out to have fun or seek for friends and partners anymore. I'm at the age most people start families or have long-term partners and groups of friends they go out with, who are more settled. It's not that I couldn't pass as a person in 20s with looks but something changed in my soul and I don't even desire the stuff that normally motivates young people to move to a bigger city. You know, that drive, pink glasses and belief everything will be a blast. I can't even imagine the crowd that would make me feel like I belong and this is why it's hard for me to find motivation to change things, to move somewhere else as a single woman. There is definitely the belief you described, that maybe I could be someone else in a new environment, become a better version of me but if not, I'd totally crash. On top of feeling alone in the world generally, I'd be also far away from family and a few people I know therefore would have zero support system, somewhere where I might not even fully understand language and local culture. 🤔 Like...it's a big step to take. Maybe not for some people but it is for me.

@CrazyMusicLover I don't know what you have been through or what you have lost, but take caution not to underestimate the adaptability of your brain. It is unsurprising that having played it safe all these years, you no longer see wonder and mystery in the world. If you have been isolated for a long time, that feeds into feelings of alienation. Idk, reading this it sounds like you'll be saying the same thing about this period of your life, that you wasted your time and missed opportunities.

@kwood1 No...?

@BlueVeins Just wondered. Don't move there

@kwood1 I believe it. Red states can go fuck themselves in general anyway.