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I Am a Christian and I Love Jesus

Hello fellow Christians. I've got a question for you. I've been raised my whole life that it isn't right to live together or sleep together before marriage. However, my best friend, my rock for all these past years, has suddenly changed her mind on this subject. She is also Christian and was raised with that same ideaology. But she's now living with her boyfriend and I'm certain they are sleeping together. Now before you jump on me and say that it's none of my business, I realize that. My problem isn't her...it's how I'm feeling. I'm sort of conflicted about it, especially since she's keeping it a secret from her family. I just can't resolve it in my head to where I feel comfortable with it. Am I a bad person? I've tried so hard to remain nonjudgmental but I can't ignore my beliefs either. I am an extremely tolerant and socially liberal Christian, for the most part. However, this is just one belief that I've held strongly. I am not planning on ratting her out or revealing my feelings about it. I know this is her business and whatever she believes is what she should follow. But how do I get over this, personally? I have a hard time letting go, and I want her to live a happy and healthy life...which she is. But I can't help but feel conflicted.
SW-User
I'm not a Christian, but I hear you! It makes sense that you have conflicted feelings and you are a good person for struggling with them as you are. It may be that what you thought of as wrong remains wrong, but you have to let others go their own way. That is how I feel about some moral issues, for example abortion. It might also be that you will end up changing your mind about right and wrong on this issue. St. Paul says, "work out your own salvation in fear and trembling" and this seems like one of those moments of trying to work it out. Blessings.
SW-User
My little bit of knowledge on Christian conventional wisdom is that your maker makes the judgment, not Christians. I think it goes.something.like He who has not sinned may cast the first stone.
marriage ultimately is just a legality at its core.. but above that its a declaration of love and commitment to each other before the world..

people who have relationsips without official commitments can set themselves up for heartbreak easily.. among other things

not to say that all married people are commited because nowadays most people are crap

as far as her and her bf are concerned.. they may or may not ever get married but

as you said its their business sorta so says the world anyway but if you have issues with her you should maybe express them directly to her eh??
Snapper · 36-40, M
If something conflicts with your beliefs, you can't easily let it go. You're not a bad person.
SW-User
I have a quite related problem. My friend is having a commitment with a man who's married and has a family already. I feel irritated whenever she talks about him. I'm so much concerned about her , I've been doing my best encouraging her to cut that relationship with him but she has really fallen in love. I would like her to find a more decent , single man who'll be with her all her life but it's still her who'll decide for her life so I can't help.
Stick to your own beliefs on this subject matter. If asked by your friend? Answer her honestly with regard to your beliefs. Until then, I would stay out of their relationship.
Motosh72 · 51-55, M
You have your beliefs, she has hers. You both need to do what makes you happy. You're both Christian. Don't sweat it - God will decide who has done right, and who has done wrong.
ileana · 26-30, F
@kekobaka: I'm sure she is. And I'm happy that she's happy. I really am. Her boyfriend is great and they are a healthy couple. But I still have trouble resolving it. It's hard to explain.
Snapper · 36-40, M
@ileana: You're worried for her, right? In your eyes, she's sinning, putting her salvation in jeopardy?
@ileana: basicly your issue is that she drooped her moral standards to hook up with her bf .. and you thought she was better than that. she disappointed your opinion of her is what

but she's only human.
Dolimyte · 41-45, M
This has no effect on you. Mind your own business

 
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