Hi, in this scenario what did I do wrong?

I was a new teacher about two years ago, teaching first time as a pretrained graduate teacher.
I was filling in for someone at the time who was on leave. Firstly it was mostly online due to COVID, and then face to face when things got better.
Now I did not know I wasn't supposed to say this but they placed a science subject I wasn't too qualified to teach on my timetable. I mentioned to the HOD of the science department if she could take me off as I'm not strong in it ( I really didn't want to embarrass myself and screw up a child's future). She told me to do it anyways.
But for the next months I did it with anxiety and fell in love. I did well teaching that subject and said nothing about it again.

Sadly I didn't know that was not a thing to say. Cause when the person I was working for came back, shortly she left the school and the position was open again.
The school called me back to teach and had me sign up papers for a full time position there. About two days after, the principal called me and fell me I have to do an interview as someone else is interested.....
When I went to the interview I saw a trained teacher ,who was there during my tenure on teaching practice ( teaching the same subject as me), come in with a senior teached ( who did not like me). She sat next to me on the interview bench, waiting for her turn and did not even greet me. When I went in for the interview process, it felt like an interrogation as the principality, nice principal and science department was on it.

Not to my surprise I did not get it but the teacher on teaching practice instead. BecuSe I have some of the teachers and HOD on my WhatsApp, I would see posts that said " many people could reach far but because of their mouth..."
I also got word through the grapevine by one person that my HOD said I didn't think I could manage one science subject.....n it's implied if I didn't say anything I could've had my job back.

What hurts me is, shouldn't they guide me and assist me better or excuse that blunder. Because my students got good marks especially cause it was a bright subject. It just felt like an excuse to me cause they didn't want me there......plus the teacher who didn't like me has a bullish tendency and verbally abusive ans I didn't even mention that to anyone.

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Motzu

That is the "Good Old Boy" system. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Old_boy_network

You just been out maneuvered by socially judgmental people who exploit the rules of a meritocracy in order to afvance the people they want. Masonic groups are literally founded on this bedrock. Most of the military is subsumed by this as well, it's only once you hit the righer officer ranks (colonel applying to become a general, they are judged equally off their theoretical papers and career record as much as their contacts, it's a 50-50 balance).

You are not going to escape this unless you figure out how to fund yourself almost exclusively off of grants in a largely research role. You didn't do wrong in admitting your weaknesses in and of itself, it is the decrepit state of the overall decaying system that sunk your progress, and your inability to recognize this and out maneuver others in advance. You should of already of been aware of this phenomena, as a fly should already know about a spider web before it ever encounters one, so as to avoid it.

You lived to tell the tale. Learn to adapt. Don't expect a fair analysis from others, but do try to give them yourself. If every element of a meritocracy fails in a system, you have yourself a darkage. The nepotism inherit in Manorialism wasn't known for it's intellectual curiosity and search for truth, and flexibility in social organization. You might have smart people around in such a system, but no pathway to societal growth. When in absolute doubt on how to proceed in such backwards systems, look to Alcuin. He was the one who broke us out of this exclusionary way of educating, but as tribal social creatures we always have a social instinct to return back to stupid, and always can find justifications outside of the facts.

LoneGirl101 · 31-35, F

@Motzu sadly I was still naive to how the system works in that regards. It was my first government job outside of call centres and I worked really hard on it.

Motzu

@LoneGirl101 It nearly killed me, consider yourself lucky.

I did work briefly on the US Analog to Digital changeover for the FCC at a call center in Moundsville, West Virginia. They had us anwsering questions customers would have about installing digital adaptors to their old analog TVs so as to get air signals, but kinda dropped the ball on giving us ANY information whatsoever on how that worked, so I was the one who had to figure it out and explain to others how it works. I explained how attennas work, coaxial cables worked, how to get gadgets that could split them up, what to do when interference hit, etc. I largely learned that from my childhood trying to steal cable or having to hold the TV attenna with my hand in order to get a signal (my body is a excellent reciever and conductor). Rest I learned from my units radioguys and occasional units attached to us like the radioguys for special forces, on how they would bounce signals off of lakes and the athmosphere to increase their range.

So when we would get weird questions like what to do when trains go by (Houston, Texas had this problem the most), what to do if a police helicopter is hovering above their house (not joking), or what to do if you are precisely stuck between to metropolitan areas with equally competing signals conflicting with one another, I got to anwser it. I took a very analytical approach, breaking the question and anwser protocol down into knowledge modules anyone else on the team could quickly figure out and apply. That program only lasted for a few weeks and then was shut down. I didn't mind it much, but don't care to move to India and work the night shift in order to continue on in that field.

GeniUs · 56-60, M

Not sure what country you're in but it's not unreasonable in the UK to ask for feedback on where you 'failed'* the interview. If they are specific about things you can rest easy that you genuinely failed. If they refuse, can't give you anything precise use phrases like 'the other candidate was just better' you know you've been given the bums rush. I don't know if knowing will help but if it turns out the other candidate interviewed better it should put your mind at rest.

*not the best way of describing it but can't think of the right word.

496sbc · 36-40, M

I really don’t see what you did wrong

LoneGirl101 · 31-35, F

@496sbc that's what I believe. I showed up early, submitted my lesson plans on time and even organised a workshop for the students who were struggling. It was my first time teaching and it still pains me.

496sbc · 36-40, M

@LoneGirl101 i believe you. I have a story about a teacher but you won’t believe it

swirlie · 31-35, F

It actually doesn't surprise me that you were not qualified for that job because the grammar and the spelling errors in your post would suggest that you have English literacy issues going on.

eMortal · M

@swirlie It's obvious all that happened in a country that doesn't have English as first language.

LoneGirl101 · 31-35, F

@swirlie errors? Sorry, let me go over and correct my mistakes 🙄

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