This post will get you pregnant
Even you, fellas, so be warned.
Consider the following equation that was solved in 1993
(JCVD + New Orleans + Creole Wilfred Brimley + Lady with Epic Eyebrows) x John Woo = Hard Target
I was going to give a more detailed breakdown, but anytime I tried to count the spinkicks or mullet shots I kept reaching a euphoric state where numbers don't exist.
And if I'm lucky enough to still be cognisant by the time Van-Damme knocks out a rattlesnake...well let's just say I have to call a vicar to explain my actions after. He wishes I wouldn't, but that's the deal when he put on the collar.

Oh yeah, and he gets into a shot out. On a motorcycle. While stood on the saddle.

I apologise to every uterus out there.
Consider the following equation that was solved in 1993
(JCVD + New Orleans + Creole Wilfred Brimley + Lady with Epic Eyebrows) x John Woo = Hard Target
I was going to give a more detailed breakdown, but anytime I tried to count the spinkicks or mullet shots I kept reaching a euphoric state where numbers don't exist.
And if I'm lucky enough to still be cognisant by the time Van-Damme knocks out a rattlesnake...well let's just say I have to call a vicar to explain my actions after. He wishes I wouldn't, but that's the deal when he put on the collar.

Oh yeah, and he gets into a shot out. On a motorcycle. While stood on the saddle.

I apologise to every uterus out there.