I Love A Gay Men Im Gay Too

I have had feelings for men for a long time and have kept it hidden, this week I said to my wife that I am attracted to other men, so played along that night and asked what I would like to do. She was very chilled out about it which surprised me, the next day we where showering and she held me in her had and asked me if I would like to suck off another man and I got hard and said yes. She let me go, finished showering and was distant for the rest of the day. That evening she asked if I was gay and I said yes I was. I feel now I need a man to start off this journey and to conform my being gay, I can then come out to the rest of my friends and family. Has another guys here had similar experiences?
I would love to hear from you