My mom asked me if my girlfriend was pregnant!
So we went to visit my folks for Thanksgiving and it was a good time. We rented an Airbnb and all brought food and drinks and we all helped with dinner.
Later that night my girlfriend and I were drunk and went upstairs to the kitchen. There was some leftover cherry pie, i served up a full quarter slice with ice cream for my gal. We were sitting on the couch in the living room. I fed her every last bit then unbuttoned her pants, lifted up her sweater and gave her a belly rub, saying,
"You ate so much today, fat girl. It's almost like your eating for two!"
She finished her dessert and we grabbed a couple beers, smoked a joint then went to bed.
The next day I was with my mom and she was like, "So what's new? Any big news for me?" I didn't know what she was getting at and i told her such. Not the most tactful person she said, "Is your girlfriend pregnant?"
I told her no and she says,
"Are you sure!?"
I asked her what on earth she was on about and she replied,
"It's just, I saw you rubbing her belly and talking about how shes eating for two. I figured I was about to become a grandmother!"
Then came the somewhat awkward conversation with my mom about how me and my partner were not planning for a child and playing it safe in that regard. I said,
"She was super bloated from dinner plus she's gained a little holiday weight and with that girl every pound goes straight to her middle!"
Then my mom shrugged and said,
"I guess I haven't seen her in a while. She used to be such a skinny thing! I could have sworn she was about 6 months pregnant by the size of that belly!"
Later, when I told my girlfriend about that interaction she, god bless her heart, says,
"Your mom's crazy! Pregnant bellies don't jiggle like this!"
Now I tease her how she looks 6 months pregnant and how the extra pounds go right to her softened midriff.
Later that night my girlfriend and I were drunk and went upstairs to the kitchen. There was some leftover cherry pie, i served up a full quarter slice with ice cream for my gal. We were sitting on the couch in the living room. I fed her every last bit then unbuttoned her pants, lifted up her sweater and gave her a belly rub, saying,
"You ate so much today, fat girl. It's almost like your eating for two!"
She finished her dessert and we grabbed a couple beers, smoked a joint then went to bed.
The next day I was with my mom and she was like, "So what's new? Any big news for me?" I didn't know what she was getting at and i told her such. Not the most tactful person she said, "Is your girlfriend pregnant?"
I told her no and she says,
"Are you sure!?"
I asked her what on earth she was on about and she replied,
"It's just, I saw you rubbing her belly and talking about how shes eating for two. I figured I was about to become a grandmother!"
Then came the somewhat awkward conversation with my mom about how me and my partner were not planning for a child and playing it safe in that regard. I said,
"She was super bloated from dinner plus she's gained a little holiday weight and with that girl every pound goes straight to her middle!"
Then my mom shrugged and said,
"I guess I haven't seen her in a while. She used to be such a skinny thing! I could have sworn she was about 6 months pregnant by the size of that belly!"
Later, when I told my girlfriend about that interaction she, god bless her heart, says,
"Your mom's crazy! Pregnant bellies don't jiggle like this!"
Now I tease her how she looks 6 months pregnant and how the extra pounds go right to her softened midriff.
36-40, M
