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Back With My Old Madame

I left my previous Madame to go back to the woman that put me on this road in the first fuckin' place.

Coerced and against my will and shit..beaten...raped...drugged and shit.

Just constant, y'know?

Was with her for fuckin' years.

Then shit happened and I went with the new Madame, which was good in terms of how she treated us but it just screwed my brains.

I mean, she was nice. She is nice. But, maybe, like...too nice.

Does that make sense?

Like, being controlled and beaten for not 'toeing the line'. Doing what is asked - ordered - in terms of what to wear, what to do, who to fuck, what drugs and shit to take. That was all down to her.

The other one was respectful and kind. Giving me freedom.

That shit is scary!

What the fuck can I do with freedom?

There's a weird kind of pleasure that you get from pleasing someone that's hard to please..berating you....forcing you into things.

Like, doing all sorts of sexual shit with men and women at the brothel and, at the end of your 15 hour shift, after having 'pleasured' 23 punters and made her a shit-tonne of coin, getting a "You've done great, bitch!" for your efforts.

That's what I was missing.

That's why I went back.

Embarrassed? 'bout everything, but letting down my old Madame.

The bitch is classy enough to still be on friendly terms with me.

I love her to bits.

But...I need this...to keep my head together.
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Tastyfrzz · 61-69, M
A friend of mine had a daughter that when told to clean her room called tge police to say that she was being abused. The police arrived, put the girl in the police car and told her that if she really was being abused she would be begging the police not to take away her mother.

The term 'trauma bond' is also known as Stockholm Syndrome. It describes a deep bond which forms between a victim and their abuser. Victims of abuse often develop a strong sense of loyalty towards their abuser, despite the fact that the bond is damaging to them.

The seven stages of trauma bonding are love bombing, trust and dependency, criticism, manipulation/gaslighting, resignation, loss of self, and addiction to the cycle. These stages describe a cycle where an abuser showers a victim with affection, builds their trust, then devalues and manipulates them, leading the victim to lose their sense of self and become addicted to the intermittent "good" moments of the relationship.

Love Bombing: The abuser showers the victim with excessive affection, compliments, and attention to create a deep and rapid attachment.

Trust and Dependency: The abuser builds trust while simultaneously fostering dependency by becoming the victim's primary source of validation and support, often isolating them from others.

Criticism: The abuser starts to devalue the victim through criticism, name-calling, and humiliation, which is often confusing and shocking.

Manipulation and Gaslighting: The abuser uses manipulation and gaslighting, making the victim doubt their own perceptions and memories.

Resignation and Giving Up: The victim begins to comply with the abuser's demands to avoid conflict, sometimes referred to as "fawning" or "people-pleasing".

Loss of Self: The victim's identity, self-esteem, and confidence diminish as they become more dependent on the abuser.

Addiction to the Cycle: The cycle of abuse followed by intermittent affection creates an addictive pattern, making it difficult for the victim to leave because they are "addicted" to the intermittent dopamine hits of love and validation from the abuser.

Treatment for Stockholm Syndrome focuses on therapy and, if needed, medication to address the underlying trauma, anxiety, and depression associated with it.

At some point, I believe you will need to come to grips with all of this. Take care of yourself.
You have friends that care.
TheOriginalCandy · 22-25, F
@Tastyfrzz I have a counsellor. I'm working some shit out. But I need Martika. She's right for me.

She's been good for me.
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