@Miram apology post, because she wanted to know what exactly I was sorry about
Dear @Miram, I am truly sorry for
-seducing your boyfriend
-digging random unmarked holes in your back yard
-riding your cow like a horse without your permission
-urinating on your roof, windows
-threatening to purchase Algeria
-replacing 16% of the low-growing shrubs within 1 km of your house with plastic plants
-advertising your hospital as a disco party on grindr
-asking the river to try flowing up
-performing sexually suggestive rain dances before outdoor gatherings which you would be attending
-camping in Call of Duty while impersonating you
-using remote controlled pigeons to delay flights you were taking
-redirecting sunlight onto you on hot days to achieve a .04% reduction in AC costs
-referring to you as "sugar tits" in conversations with @PiecingBabyFaceTogether
Please accept my sincerest apologies, I didn't mean to hurt you baby. <3
-seducing your boyfriend
-digging random unmarked holes in your back yard
-riding your cow like a horse without your permission
-urinating on your roof, windows
-threatening to purchase Algeria
-replacing 16% of the low-growing shrubs within 1 km of your house with plastic plants
-advertising your hospital as a disco party on grindr
-asking the river to try flowing up
-performing sexually suggestive rain dances before outdoor gatherings which you would be attending
-camping in Call of Duty while impersonating you
-using remote controlled pigeons to delay flights you were taking
-redirecting sunlight onto you on hot days to achieve a .04% reduction in AC costs
-referring to you as "sugar tits" in conversations with @PiecingBabyFaceTogether
Please accept my sincerest apologies, I didn't mean to hurt you baby. <3
