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I'd Rather Get To Know You Than Small Talk

Here a few weeks ago, I did a post based on the following exercise: Share three things from your day and how you felt about them. I live alone, so don't have anyone here at home I can talk to, and I think in some ways I've fallen into the assumption that no one would want to know how I feel. So I'm going to do that exercise here, as a way of challenging my own assumption. Every big oak tree begins as a tiny acorn, and who knows what this little acorn of a post might grow into?

1. I recently started a blog on dealing with interpersonal conflict, which is a subject I've always been interested in. My latest article was about speaking another's 'language of apology', which basically means putting in a little extra effort to learn how someone else views a meaningful apology. The article brought up sadness for me, because the men in my family aren't apologizers at all, and that was a significant factor in why I decided I'd rather live without a man in my life.

2. I have a quasi-ongoing conflict with my brother based on his inability to either understand or respect that there are certain behavior he engages in probably not meaning any harm, but which I feel really disrespected by, and it has to do with the fact that our tastes are just different. It's gone on since we were kids, and I can write some of the kid stuff off based on our age difference (I'm nearly 5 years older) and him being male, and while it's better now than when we were kids, every time we get crosswise with each other, he still does it. And my heart is so black and blue from him doing this for years and years that I can't take much more of it. I have an idea for a way to handle it the next time it comes up, but it requires knowing his tastes well enough to craft a story I can tell him. I've struggled with figuring out what to build the story around, but I think I might have finally come up with an idea. I was playing around earlier with some of the things that could happen in the story and questions I could ask my brother about the story's action, and the whole idea makes me feel hopeful. If I prepare well, there's a chance he might FINALLY get the point!

3. I go in and out of phases where I exercise regularly. I love how I feel when I do it, but the last time I did it, I came down with a knee injury and had to quit for a while. That got me out of the habit, but I've been feeling lately like I'd like to start exercising again. I've gone walking about 3x over the last week, including today, and it felt really good. That's not an emotion, but still something I felt!
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SW-User
Oh the sibling thing, I can relate. My older sister drives me nuts. She does or doesn't do something revolving my kids. It's difficult when you feel your children are impacted by actions. However, I've gotten past it in a few ways. I'm really careful to pay attention to their reactions. Sometimes I'm more hurt than they are. I've also had to pick my battles and lower my expectations. For her children I would move heaven & earth and think of them constantly and include them in everything. This extends to her step children and grand children. It's not the same for my kids. My kids know that and so do I. That's who she is, her relationship is different with my kids than mine is with hers. Hopefully, they'll come visit me when I'm in an old folks home. When she's in an old folks home, she better be in the same one as me... They don't call her Rusty Nails for nothing.
Thanks for sharing, by the way.