My days as a tiktok super stud are officially over.I could not go on knowing I'm taking all the ladies away from other desperate tiktok dudes. So I retired. Now I'm back here to annoy you.
Im going to make breakfast and listen to my Titney Spears recordsIf this bothers you or otherwise insults you, good.
Water flavored ice cream will be the only thing sold at my NBA gamesI want y'all to eat as healthy as possible. Maybe Gatorade ice cream if you behave
That time those mean boys threw that one legged dog up into the loftActually the dog was just a head and a tail. Yes this really happened. I'm always serious. Always.
If I ever get in the NBA, I want slow motion footage of myself making three pointersI want the world to see my moobies wiggle in slow motion
Ah so it is possible!Im smashed off of angry orchard hard cider. Best buzz I've ever had. And I'm drinkintg to Dolly, whether you like it or not. That baby has a home with a vet tech now, and all her needs can easily be addressed. My heart and soul is hemorrhaging,... See More »
For you, Dolly girl...My sweet meezer. You have followed me on so many adventures. Been there for me in the good times and the bad. We saved each other more than once. And now, our paths split and we must go our own separate ways. But I leave you in hands far more... See More » (1)
You ever just look at someone and wonder what their reaction would be if you roared at them like a T-Rex?
My boogers have a confession!I will be leaving Tennessee very soon. May 12th soon, that is, never to return except to visit my family. My destination? Pennsylvania! My buddies made me offer that I could not refuse. And so a new adventure begins for myself and Dolly!
For those of you who doubted me...I present to you the glorious and official Jaws 50th Anniversary coloring book! That's right, now you too can color the gory death of little Alex Kintner! Just make sure you stay in the lines, this bad boi wasn't cheap! (2)
Since I was a female for a short time while in the womb...Do you think this would make me eligible to be a cam girl? I need the extra cash. Serious comments only, lest ye face my wrath!
I got slapped in the face by a tree limb the other day, whilst mowing...Now my eye is swollen shut. Battle wounds, me dear, battle wounds...
Look, the only reason I bought the NBA game is because MLB The Show isn't available on steam!And I'll be damned if I'm not seriously enjoying it.
I'd like to interrupt your regular SW posting with an important message!Boop your cat's nose so you can fulfill your booping quota, otherwise they will eat your shoes.
I can jump really highEspecially when I'm surprised by a snake. I'd show you, but I hate being surprised by things. It would be nice if snakes would give me a heads up before visiting me. Like a note in the mailbox or something.
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