I Am So In Love

im ashamed of how ive been claiming carelessly to "fall" in love and i actually did with him. i didnt want him to see me like i was just another ridiculous schoolgirl with a crush so i was......shy u could say to talk to him becuz of how i was embarrassed to "be "in love" so many times but for the first time wat i was feeling was real and i didnt think i deserved to feel that way with him. i wanted him to like me so i was afraid if i started being emotionally/affectionately/romantically intimidating i'd push him away. when i saw that he wanted the same things in a way that was like me i felt safer to be myself around him. i didnt understand i'd always been desperate to force myself to have fake love but he makes me feel like i dont have to be the perfect princess i was trying to be with a guy which is a relief