I Was Abandoned By My Mother

My mom didn't really act like a mother towards me. She never really wanted me at all. She abandoned me when I was 10. She left a note to my late dad and I saying she can no longer take care of me or want to be part of my family. She left. I thought she was joking. I would wait every night for her to come back but she never came back. Ever! I was often jealous of my friends because they had loving mothers in their lives.
Why couldn't my mom be like other moms? I saw her again and promised we would hang but she said she had something going on and she left again. I knew I shouldn't have believed her! I yelled why did she leave when I needed her! I never wanna see my mom again! I tried so hard to have a mother daughter relationship but I gave up. I never had a loving mom! 😭😭😭😭😢😢😢😢😕😞😣😡😡😡😠😠