I Hate What Insecurity Causes
Really struggling at the moment due to massive personal insecurities. I'm a little overweight, go to a high-achieving university but it makes me feel very stupid, I don't like how I look or many personality traits. I'm just really hating waking up and being myself at the moment. I'm in the process of changing things, such as dieting/exercising, trying even harder with work etc but nothing seems to be working.
It's also affecting my relationship even though I don't want it to. I'm finding it really hard to be happy for my partner when he wants to achieve something such as doing a 10k run. He will be really excited about it and training really hard and I'm outwardly trying to support him but I'm taking this as pressure for me to do better, be fitter, match his ability. But instead of motivating, I'm just hating myself massively more and more. Similarly, he did really well in university exams and whilst i congratulated him, I just took this and thought about how stupid I am and how I never achieve what I want to despite trying etc.
Does anyone have any advice on how to overcome this kind of self-hatred? Particularly so I don't become a toxic girlfriend!
It's also affecting my relationship even though I don't want it to. I'm finding it really hard to be happy for my partner when he wants to achieve something such as doing a 10k run. He will be really excited about it and training really hard and I'm outwardly trying to support him but I'm taking this as pressure for me to do better, be fitter, match his ability. But instead of motivating, I'm just hating myself massively more and more. Similarly, he did really well in university exams and whilst i congratulated him, I just took this and thought about how stupid I am and how I never achieve what I want to despite trying etc.
Does anyone have any advice on how to overcome this kind of self-hatred? Particularly so I don't become a toxic girlfriend!
