I Am Proud of Something I Did
This morning I made a decision. It wasn't an easy decision but it was one that had to be made. I've been stuck in an on-again / off-again "relationship" for the last 18 months and it has been wearing me down slowly but surely. Draining the last remnants of my already shaky self esteem until there is pretty much nothing left.
This morning I saw the man in question and without sounding melodramatic, without any tears or emotion, I told him that I deserve more than what we have going on and then if he isn't up to the task he should leave and not return.
It hurt! It hurt like mad! Laying yourself bare like that to someone. Telling them that they are the person you want and not really knowing whether they want you in the same way but telling them anyway, hoping that they will chose you.
In my mind I know it's over but my stupid heart hopes that he will indeed pick me.
This morning I saw the man in question and without sounding melodramatic, without any tears or emotion, I told him that I deserve more than what we have going on and then if he isn't up to the task he should leave and not return.
It hurt! It hurt like mad! Laying yourself bare like that to someone. Telling them that they are the person you want and not really knowing whether they want you in the same way but telling them anyway, hoping that they will chose you.
In my mind I know it's over but my stupid heart hopes that he will indeed pick me.