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Will you help a friend that is addicted to drugs and homeless with cash ?

What would you do if a friend asked you for money? This friend is homeless (which you just found out about) and has been addicted to crack for 20 years. ..😪.
This is the reason she is now homeless. For me, it is sad that things are going so bad... I haven't heard from her in five years. And she accused me of having an affair with her husband 😄😐 I want to help her - but I'm afraid that something will happen to her by having a drug overdose -with the money I send her. I want to know what is the right thing to do?

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hartfire

No.

Addicts are brilliant at manipulating others into giving money. They lie, steal, sneak around, and deceive. They [i]can't not[/i] because the drug is in control of their behaviour.

If this person has managed to survive her addiction for 20 years it means she's a master at survival. She has an encyclopedia of resources: places to find shelter, second hand clothes, food, and the means to hustle for money for her drug of choice.

I'm in CoDependents Anonymous. Codependency is what's called a "process addiction". One is addicted to helping addicts or people in serious forms of dependency.
Helping them helps patch the addict up after each crisis, thus enabling and prolonging the addiction.
Codependency is an amazingly destructive process. You appear kind, good and heroic. You feel you're being so wonderfully virtuous. But it involves trying to control another's behaviour. It drains your energy and resources till you yourself are in crisis, usually depressed, possibly to the point of suicide.

Others cannot help an addict; only an addict can help him or herself. Each person has a "rock bottom", a point at which being an addict becomes intolerable - it's different for each person. They will remain in denial (imagining they can control the addiction) until they reach that rock bottom. It could be some serious health or emotional crisis. But some never wake up to the truth. They die.

A 12-Step program involves coming to believe in a God or Higher Power who (which) can help get off the drug(s).
If the person is an atheist, the group can be treated as a higher power. (In CoDA, I chose Unconditional Love as my HP and find it works.)
The program involves choosing a sponsor, who has themself successfully recovered. They help by being available for phone calls and meeting - but it's tough love and nothing but.
Regular meetings, making amends for past transgressions, healing the wounds that caused the addiction in the first place - all slowly create a new and functional way of living. It's an extremely hard process because it involves first the withdrawals, and then accepting and facing all the pain and problems that the addiction once masked or medicated.
There is no easy way to recover.

Please do not let this addict con you into giving her money. The sooner she reaches her rock bottom, the greater her chance of recovery.