I Am An Amputee

the worst part about being an amputee is the never ending imagination you have of how other people look at you. with a friend, i imagine them thinking to themselves whether i'm able to use the bathroom on my own and feeling sorry for me. with my mom, i imagine her seeing how much help i need and feeling scared for my future. with my husband, i imagine him secretly resenting me for not being able to do the most basic things and changing our life and marriage forever. it's been long enough now that when my caregiver helps me with things, i no longer feel embarrassed. but i still worry about how much he must pity me when i need help with even things like eating and putting on clothes