I Am Estranged From Family Members

Two self serving people get married and have 2 kids of their own. One decided to cheat, lie, do drugs, and abuse the other. The other gave up, gave in, threw everything to the 4 winds and they both divorced. Both remarried others who either had more kids, or created more kids with them. The first 2 kids were marginalized and pushed out and made to feel unwelcome. I was the younger of two. It wouldn't hurt so much if I didn't see them as time passed, show such tenderness and love towards the other kids. Our inheritance was given away or sold, our grandparents passed and anyone else that ever celebrated who we were as members of the family. Both of my parents have rejected me and my husband and kids in their own way. They are just.....apathetic to the mess they left behind. I live with that sad feeling every day. I feel like I imagine what an orphan would feel like. I almost wish that I had been given up to another family. Then maybe I would have known the love of an extended family. I am grown now.....much more than grown. I'm 45 years old, married to a loving husband and have 2 kids that I adore and we are all very close. But the loss from extended family estrangement is horrible and lingering. I am a christian and know I will see my grandparents some day and I hold on to that hope. I honestly don't know other than the Lord and the one set of grandparents....who would come to meet me when I got up there. It hurts my heart because it feels like everyone else has this great reunion to look forward to. I will have my grandparents to meet me and I know they will be there....but that's it. Makes me sad sometimes.