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I Am A Victim Of Emotional Abuse And Verbal Abuse

My mom was verbally abusive. It was hurtful and made me cry. You would think I would be attracted to nice women who would treat me kindly. No, I am attracted to women who verbally abuse me.

The woman who was most cruel to me is the one I am most drawn towards. Her verbal abuse is especially stinging. She has called me ugly and a loser. Like my mom, she has a drinking problem and gets all the meaner when she drinks. Yet I feel very connected to her. She sent me a valentines card and told me she loves me. I know she really does, more than anyone she has ever met and I feel the same way about her.

I have broken up with her before because her abuse was too much for me. Now I miss everything about her,even her abuse. If we get together again I will try to take her abuse with a grain of salt. I just need to be calm and realize no matter what she is saying she is with the person she loves the most.
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😞 It's such a painful, glass shard ridden sort of love.

Hard to keep in perspective, that what we are drawn to is not often what is good for us, only what we know and find comfort in.