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I Think Love Has No Age

For nearly two years now, I have been in love with a man more than twenty years my senior. We decided, largely because of the age gap, that a relationship was untenable.
How much of the struggle was because of how society views age-gap relationships, I shall never know.
But I know this. Love knows no barrier. Not race, not gender, not age. I wish society understood this better.
Still, I am incredibly lucky to have experienced such deep, true love. I think very few people get to experience it at all, let alone keep it.

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Heartlander · 80-89, M

We have family members with 12+ year gaps between husband and wife. Reflecting on my grandparents' generation, a 10+ year gap was also normal then. The narrow age gap thing is more a more modern USA type thing. In other cultures a 20 year gap may be closer to the norm.

In those cultures, there is an expectation that the male take time to first establish himself so as to first assure security before marring and raising a family. Also, in cultures where property ownership is an important part of security, men may have to wait for their parents to pass away so they can inherit that security.

Randomlygenerated · 26-30, F

@Heartlander This is very true. It used to be considere normal to marry a man a good bit older and so more established in life. I also have Iranian friends with a 20yr age gap. It annoys me slightly that people say "oh of course that's fine... for them". Why not fine for anyone who is in love?

Heartlander · 80-89, M

Love serves as the incentive for most marriages regardless of age. One of my grandparents had an18 or 19 year gap when they married. The wife, my grandma, died just a few years after they married, very young, in her mid 20, and per the family stories my grandpa visibly carried the grief for the next 25 years, until the day he died.

Julienne · 51-55, F

@Heartlander Although my heart is tougher now cuZ I never got to experience deep unconditional love myself, im still sorry about your Grandpa. Grieving can last a lifetime.