I Am Sensitive
I can get so sensitive about things I don't want to care about. It's one of my weaknesses. I can't tell myself to just stop thinking about whatever it is that is upsetting me. Even after I have studied why I am feeling this way and the person's behaviour that was terrible or shocking, that isn't enough. Instead, I keep going back to the negative feelings, re-feeling them when something reminds me of them. I wish they would go away.
For example, I had a terrible flatmate last year. She is a narcissistic, nasty person who puts others down, and makes fun of them to people she compliments and uplifts, to climb up her artificial social ladder. She made a rude Facebook page about one of the flatmates whom she made fun of all the time, and when I stood up to how nasty she was being about joking about how her mum should pass away already so she could get her money, she started to make my life a living hell, which she continued to do any time I didn't do things 'her' way.
She ended up removing me as a friend, but I saw on Facebook today how she tagged another flatmate on the comment section of a post made by the flatmate she made fun of nonstop. She was clearly still making fun of him, still putting him down, but he doesn't get it or doesn't care. The other flatmate who was tagged knows that flatmate is a terrible person, openly admits it, but knows that by being her 'friend' it will make life easier for her. It makes life easier for her because the nasty flatmate won't make her life a living nightmare like she did to me.
It disturbs me how so few people are willing to stand up for their values. It's not different from the police in the US who are standing idly by as their fellow coworkers shoot rubber bullets at peaceful Native American protests. It's not different from people willing to turn a blind eye to corruption for the sake of not having to get involved or in trouble for speaking the truth or standing up to the corruption. I am not one of those people. I stand up for what I believe in, and it can make my life a living hell, but I would not have it any other way because it shows I care not only about my own values, but about the effects that malicious behaviour has on all that surrounds us. I wish more would do the same.
It's been a shock to me how so few people really stand up to obvious issues they are witnessing. It's as if they don't think they are participating, since they aren't actively causing the harm, but silence IS a form of communication. Silence against the adversaries being witnessed is an act of permitting those very adversaries. I challenge people to stand up for what they believe in. If something feels wrong, don't shrug it off, don't sit back and expect someone else to make the change. You are the change.
For example, I had a terrible flatmate last year. She is a narcissistic, nasty person who puts others down, and makes fun of them to people she compliments and uplifts, to climb up her artificial social ladder. She made a rude Facebook page about one of the flatmates whom she made fun of all the time, and when I stood up to how nasty she was being about joking about how her mum should pass away already so she could get her money, she started to make my life a living hell, which she continued to do any time I didn't do things 'her' way.
She ended up removing me as a friend, but I saw on Facebook today how she tagged another flatmate on the comment section of a post made by the flatmate she made fun of nonstop. She was clearly still making fun of him, still putting him down, but he doesn't get it or doesn't care. The other flatmate who was tagged knows that flatmate is a terrible person, openly admits it, but knows that by being her 'friend' it will make life easier for her. It makes life easier for her because the nasty flatmate won't make her life a living nightmare like she did to me.
It disturbs me how so few people are willing to stand up for their values. It's not different from the police in the US who are standing idly by as their fellow coworkers shoot rubber bullets at peaceful Native American protests. It's not different from people willing to turn a blind eye to corruption for the sake of not having to get involved or in trouble for speaking the truth or standing up to the corruption. I am not one of those people. I stand up for what I believe in, and it can make my life a living hell, but I would not have it any other way because it shows I care not only about my own values, but about the effects that malicious behaviour has on all that surrounds us. I wish more would do the same.
It's been a shock to me how so few people really stand up to obvious issues they are witnessing. It's as if they don't think they are participating, since they aren't actively causing the harm, but silence IS a form of communication. Silence against the adversaries being witnessed is an act of permitting those very adversaries. I challenge people to stand up for what they believe in. If something feels wrong, don't shrug it off, don't sit back and expect someone else to make the change. You are the change.
31-35, F
