I Am So Alone
I feel like I have the weight of the world on my shoulders and no way in hell to carry it all.
This world teaches you "Work hard, you will get where you wanna be." That's frankly bullshit. I've worked hard for 40 years and have shit to show for it. If that were true, millions of laborers who work their asses off every day for little pay would be kings. Let's just stop glorifying that antiquated 1950s way of thinking, okay? Because this is 2020 and that's just NOT how things work anymore.
I feel so alone. I have no one to talk to about all the shit that is piled on my shoulders and all the expectations I can't meet. Anytime I try to talk about it I'm shushed by people who think I've no right to complain. So...who [i]does[/i] have the right to complain? There is ALWAYS someone who has it worse. Is misery a contest?
I just sleep constantly now. I want to die. I have no one to share my burdens. I have no family support. My family doesn't even check on me. I haven't seen or heard from my dad in years. Had to cut my mother out of my life in February because she has gone insane and accused me of plotting to murder her (I haven't even seen her in over 2 years). My brother texts me once a month but he is always working and has his own life and shouldn't be bothered with my shitty situation.
I guess this vent is over.
This world teaches you "Work hard, you will get where you wanna be." That's frankly bullshit. I've worked hard for 40 years and have shit to show for it. If that were true, millions of laborers who work their asses off every day for little pay would be kings. Let's just stop glorifying that antiquated 1950s way of thinking, okay? Because this is 2020 and that's just NOT how things work anymore.
I feel so alone. I have no one to talk to about all the shit that is piled on my shoulders and all the expectations I can't meet. Anytime I try to talk about it I'm shushed by people who think I've no right to complain. So...who [i]does[/i] have the right to complain? There is ALWAYS someone who has it worse. Is misery a contest?
I just sleep constantly now. I want to die. I have no one to share my burdens. I have no family support. My family doesn't even check on me. I haven't seen or heard from my dad in years. Had to cut my mother out of my life in February because she has gone insane and accused me of plotting to murder her (I haven't even seen her in over 2 years). My brother texts me once a month but he is always working and has his own life and shouldn't be bothered with my shitty situation.
I guess this vent is over.
41-45, F
