I Want to Be a Teacher
But I don't know if I can do it. It's been 7 years since I graduated physics. I don't know half the stuff in school curricula anymore. I tried a PGCE in the UK but failed - 2nd placement school gave me a class of 30 y7 kids, 5 of whom had SEN. They didn't tell me about those 5. No advice whatsoever. No support. I failed. I dropped out.
So my options for next year are to be a secondary school science teacher in a private school in rural South Africa (very accountable position) or volunteer in databa<x>ses and learn something I can use when I come home.
We need to pay off credit cards from our luxurious life for the last 2 years out there. We also need to plan our wedding. But I need a career. And I don't know if I can really teach. Or if I will fail dismally.
My question is, should I try? Really? Is this an opportunity I should not pass up? I don't know. I really, truly, don't know. And it scares me. It upsets me to the point of crying right now. I wish I knew what to do. I think I do. I think I teach. If I fail, I know I tried. Databa<x>se programming can be done anytime. I won't try another PGCE if I don't do this now, so this is probably my shot. We're not going to another country either, battling immigration in one country is plenty enough for one lifetime. So I couldn't do TEFL or something like that. Not worth the paperwork for us to move again.
I'm scared though. So scared.
xx
So my options for next year are to be a secondary school science teacher in a private school in rural South Africa (very accountable position) or volunteer in databa<x>ses and learn something I can use when I come home.
We need to pay off credit cards from our luxurious life for the last 2 years out there. We also need to plan our wedding. But I need a career. And I don't know if I can really teach. Or if I will fail dismally.
My question is, should I try? Really? Is this an opportunity I should not pass up? I don't know. I really, truly, don't know. And it scares me. It upsets me to the point of crying right now. I wish I knew what to do. I think I do. I think I teach. If I fail, I know I tried. Databa<x>se programming can be done anytime. I won't try another PGCE if I don't do this now, so this is probably my shot. We're not going to another country either, battling immigration in one country is plenty enough for one lifetime. So I couldn't do TEFL or something like that. Not worth the paperwork for us to move again.
I'm scared though. So scared.
xx
36-40, M
