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I Will Always Remember What Is Important To Me

Another dead child dying in a car
If you need to put your cell phone in your back seat to remember you have a child
Not only should you not be a parent
It should be mandatory that you never have another one

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cherokeepatti · 61-69, F

Too many of them happening for me to believe that every one is accidental. It seems to be a trend. I wonder how many are because someone wanted a different lifestyle or not to pay child support for over a decade or even done as a sacrifice and would make it look like an accident. I took a child out of a hot car when i was 14, neighbor lady came to visit. She had been in our house talking for over 30 minutes and I heard a horn honking. Went to the front door & looked out, it was only our car and her car. Went back to the living room & heard it again so I walked out and checked. She left her toddler in the car (many times would leave with a babysitter all day so I didn't expect him to be there)...it was hot in the low 90's the window was half-way down. The toddler was on the floorboard under the steering wheel trying to pull himself up. He was covered with gritty sand, pieces of cigarette tobacco, smelled like a combo of urine & sweat & was soaking wet. He saw me and let out a little cry sounding more like a kitten than a baby. I got him out of the car and about that time his mother and my aunt & uncle came out to see what happened. I got so angry I couldn't control my mouth and told the woman he could have died in that car & if I ever caught her leaving him in it alone again I'd beat her butt...she started apologizing and said she wouldn't do it again. My aunt & uncle tried to calm me down but I was still angry...they said it wasn't none of my business and I yelled it became my business when I found him, and I wasn't going to apologize for my anger and I never did. That woman had a mental problem but she knew better, she liked to go around to people's homes and sit and lie and brag all day long...

rckt148 · 61-69, M

@cherokeepatti more have died in Florida since I posted this ,I don't get it

cherokeepatti · 61-69, F

@rckt148 I never heard of women kidnapping pregnant women and cutting the babies out of their bellies to steal them and then after the first one got in the news it started happening more and more. I know people get distracted when their routine changes but don't understand how they completely forget about a child back in the back seat.

MaryJanine · 61-69, F

Cherokee Patti - one or a dozen, it doesn't matter. Sure, I feel badly about the statistics, too, but how many parents give you the feeble excuse that "they forgot" they had a child or children in the car? How do you forget the little ones you brought into this world?

Leaving a cell phone may not be a solution. Kids will play with electronics if left to themselves, and the fancier that phone is, the more they might mess up a program or setting on it if they play with yours. Then the mechanism jams and they can't call for help if their lives depended on it (which it does).

The days when we could roll windows down and manually lock doors are over.If it is too hot for you, it's worse for the kids. Either leave them home with a sitter or someone who can be responsible for them, or take them in the store or wherever with you. Just don't forget your kid or kids are THERE - right beside you or in the back seat.

cherokeepatti · 61-69, F

@MaryJanine Am thinking that the "leaving the cell phone" might get the parent's attention since it's something they always carry with them. I don't know. People don't look in the backseat when they lock the car up? They just lock it and run? If they care they'll leave their purse, their lunch bag, brief case, phone, etc. on the floor in the back of the car and then they'll have to look.

MaryJanine · 61-69, F

Maybe they might. I don't know. But my mom had as many as four kids at one time when she was alive and driving, and she never left us or anything to amuse us in the car. That was before cellphones (1960's) were heard of. We went into wherever she was going together - the eldest pushed the shopping cart with the baby in it, and my younger brother and I rode the bottom of the cart. We didn't sit in a hot car for what seems like hours but was in reality only minutes. My girlfriend had six children (all of various ages) and she took all of them with her and made a "nose count" before going to shop. Again, she made sure not to leave them in a hot vehicle.

I agree with the thought, but the cellphone makers urge you to take the phone with you "while you shop". I did that just once when I went to the grocery store. It rang three times while in my pocket, and each time it was a telemarketer. That's why I went back to a landline the first minute I could and gave up the cellphone.

abooklover · 56-60, F

It does happen accidentally at times. I've investigated one of these incidents and you can't imagine the effect on the parents. They'll never recover. Tragic.

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rckt148 · 61-69, M

@iamnikki I am not this ladies judge ,I can't imagine Forgetting my child
My ex wife did get high and forget 2 of our kids on Miami beach in a playpen
My youngest at the time was cooked with sunburn ,she never got high again .

I am the one always wanting to know where the baby is ,if its head is secure where it can't flop around ,its the last thing in the car and the first thing out ,maybe seeing all the death makes me more aware .

The thing about putting something important to you with your baby so you don't forget your baby gets me ,that was the reason for the post .

Nothing should be more important than your kids
My Grandkids are all almost grown and I am still reminding them of things to keep them safe .
I believe in prevention ,and avoid regret
I get common sense is not so common anymore ,we are way to distracted
so prideful in our multitasking ,
I can't talk and listen at the same time and do both effectively
Its been tested ,I am less than 1/2 on both ,and I am good at playing an instrument ,singing and listening to the crowd to judge which music they like best ,,
But I wouldn't leave my guitar in a hot car ,I sure as hell would not forget my baby
As to this lady ,I am sorry got her loss and grief ,i'll pray for her peace .

iamnikki · 31-35, F

@rckt148 I do agree with "putting something important to you with your baby so you don't forget your baby..". I do not agree that "Not only should you not be a parent It should be mandatory that you never have another one ".
I understand all cases are NOT the same. I'm done and I'm moving on.

rckt148 · 61-69, M

@iamnikki I respect your point of view ,you can't understand unless you have walked in my shoes or theirs ,abortion is another debate I avoid ,
I will never put my 2 cents into that subject again to support it ,
Unless its personal ,you only see what you chose to see .
But once you walk in those shoes ,you will never see things the same way again
I respect you ,and your views ,this is just to close to home for me I guess
Have a good one
I will always support you having an opinion ,even if I don't agree 🤗

Mamapolo2016 · F

It is difficult to believe it’s accidental.

iamnikki · 31-35, F

Where at? I don't have kids but. I can see how a parent would make a mistake. I could link a story if you'd like. Maybe some don't want their kids and or leave them in cars on purpose but I refuse to believe parent is bad because of an accident.

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iamnikki · 31-35, F

@rckt148 And I get that. Just don't like nor agree with the last two points and I don't have to. My point is accidents happen, Not referring to your story because I don't have the full story. Good day

DallasCowboysFan · 61-69, M

@iamnikki It's unfortunate but I don't think that a parent willingly leaves their child in a hot car. Sometimes people have things on their minds, some get distracted....a parent that does that has to live with their behavior for the rest of their life. It's a huge burden. One bad decision in your life does not define who someone is.

rckt148 · 61-69, M

@DallasCowboysFan and I agree ,and my saying they should not have other kids may have been harsh ,I have a lot going on in my own life and how I feel from day to day my alter things I say ,I am not perfect either ..
But as one who has had kids die in my arms ,this is not an easy topic for me
Nor abortion ,,I gave advice on that subject many years ago that now that I have seen the outcome ,,,I wish I had kept my know it all opinion to myself
Only the one in that situation will have to live with the outcome and the constant reminders ,,,that sometimes our actions come with consequences ,and many times NOTHING we do can fix it when our choice was not the right one .

The thing that set me off was the comment
To put your purse or your phone with your kid ,,something important to you that you won't forget ,,PERIOD !!!!! that pissed me off
IF YOUR PHONE MEANS MORE TO YOU THAN YOUR CHILD ,,,
YOU DON'T NEED KIDS and for that I will NOT apologize
If your phone means more to you than your kid
You should not be a parent ,
My ex left our kids on a beach in a play pen ,,she was high
She NEVER got high again ,,nor did she ever forget she had kids
We all make mistakes ,,I sure have ,and some we have to deal with the rest of our lives
The ones I hate dealing with ,,are the little ones I couldn't save
They were already gone ,,,but for the sake of a Mom
I pretended like I was trying ,,,but it was gone ,it was her fault
But I did show compassion ,and I tried to comfort her and Dads
But now I have to remember their loss too
So forgive me if sometimes I say

Wake up People ,your kids are your future ,,they are not broken toys
when they are gone ,no one can fix them

Crazywaterspring · 61-69, M

How many of these cases make it to a jury trial? How would leaving a child strapped in a car seat be explained to a group of parents and grandparents? The idea of a child dying like that enraged and baffles.

MaryJanine · 61-69, F

It's happened before and will happen again. There are people who conveniently "forget" their child is/are in the car with them. Just like there is those parent or parents who have had enough of being Mommy or Daddy and arrange for those kids to drown or suffocate or something else. First they deny doing it, then confess to doing it later. There are several "semi-cold"cases in the news right now where the parents raised Hail Columbia when their kids died in some sort of tragedy, then admit they did it.

rckt148 · 61-69, M

@Crazywaterspring Most of them are ruled accidental ,and thats it
I am sure it ruins the parents life ,I know me ,I would never be the same
no words of comfort could undo the event
I would replay the day over and over the rest of my life .
I gave up driving for 9 yrs ,when my drinking and driving almost killed my wife
she still bears the scar of my ignorance ,losing a child that way
I might kill myself ,,
So I do not post this with lack of sympathy for those who have lost a child ,
but one was to many ,now its a common thing ,thats why I am mad

MaryJanine · 61-69, F

Have you seen the latest one where some adult killed his two daughters and his wife, then spent at least a week saying they were kidnapped and killed - only to admit he had done it? That is surely not accidental. That is deliberate.

I am truly sorry about the event involving you and your wife. I grew up with an alcoholic childhood household. I used to be scared to get into car when my father had been drinking. As an adult, I look back and realize it was by the grace of God that me, my mother, and my siblings survived potential car crashes or near accidents.

Don't attempt to kill yourself. The memory will never go away for either of you, true, but you must go on in whatever length of life God decides to give you. Don't leave anyone who will be left after you to mourn and ask why you did it. Both of my parents are gone now, but although I miss them greatly, I have too much to do to end my life prematurely.

Countrylovin68 · 51-55, F

That’s so sad!

bijouxbroussard · F

I can’t even imagine how people [b]do[/b] that. Very tragic. 😞

rckt148 · 61-69, M

@bijouxbroussard they just said another one died yesterday in Georgia too ,
Its just to frequent ,
People need to get off their damn phones and remember they have kids

Crazywaterspring · 61-69, M

@rckt148 So many people have lives that revolve around those damned phones. Is FB that compelling?

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