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I Have a Secret I Have Never Told Anyone

When I was younger I killed our albino rabbit, he lived a very long life either way.And I did it because I believed I really loved him, and I wanted to know if it would make a difference.
So I kept shoving alfalfa down his throat till he choked.
And it didn't matter at all.
I always hated that, thinking that I loved something and then realizing it was irrelevant to me the whole time.
Back then, I didn't understand a lot. I was curious, and questioning my concept of death and what it meant to lose something.

I was confused because I expected something like in the movies. I wanted to cry like Leo DiCaprio in Basketball Diaries, and I was truly disappointed. I lacked some common sense in my earlier adolescence.
It is what it is though.
I never experimented like that again.
Now and days I couldn't bring myself to harm a spider.
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Goralski · 51-55, M
Thank god yo little sister didn't enter yo mind