I Am Emotionally Torn

I don't even have words for it. I wish I hadn't told him so we couldve just enjoyed our night together, so he could've gotten some sleep... North Carolina, is a long ways away. Its a drive i wouldnt make very often to CT. And i hate to say it... but a long distance relationship wouldn't work for me. i dont think it would work for you either to be honest. what will this be? You expect me to commute for years in order to keep this going? When im the only one driving? I couldnt do it... i love you, and i love my family. and im torn. im very torn. after seeing you get so upset at the thought of me moving, ive felt like shit. ive felt like youll be this way until i go. will you be bitter towards me? For choosing my family? will this be how it is? I dont want this, i dont want to leave you, but i dont want to stay here either... i dont even want to live, like wtf...