I Want to Share My Life Story
Dreaming of being a Ballerina
From a very young age, all I ever wanted to be was a ballerina. On television I would watch the ballet for hours and would fantasise about the men dancers picking me up and letting me fly. I think for most young girls in Russia this was always a dream. Boys wanted to be footballers or scientists, girls wanted to dance ballet.
When I was 14 years old I was accepted into the Vaganova Academy in St Petersburg. It was the second year I had auditioned for this. Everyone in Ladushkin was very happy for me, I was in the local newspapers as it was not a big town and Vaganova was of course very famous.
I cried when I realised I would have to leave home, but my mother and fatehr were very supportive. We were not rich but certainly did not struggle for money, I realise looking back there would have to have been many sacrifices made to send me to this prestigious school. At the time I was not aware of this. Looing back I cry now when I think about it. I cannot thank my mother and fatehr enough for the chance they gave me in life, and I wonder if I was good enough to deserve it.
I worked very hard and studied very hard for years at Vaganove, not just on ballet and dance but also on academic studies. It was important to achieve all schooling as of course not everyone would get to be a dancer. I would be lying to say I enjoyed other studies. I did ok at chemistry, geography and literature but never mathematics or physics, my grades there were never good. My heart was only ever in ballet though.
I was able to achieve so much in dancing, I did a lot of performances and enjoyed all my years as a teenager at the academy. Of course there were temptations - I was in trouble more than once for meeting with boys and drinking alcohol, this was not well received but I understand it is part of growing up.
I was part of the performance group for a year after graduating from the academy, it was a wonderful time. We toured internationally, to Germany and to Sweden and Finland. I never had any main parts but was always able to perfomr on stage as a dancer, this was a dream. After a year or two I had the options, I could stay with the ballet or take the opportunity to travel. I was accepted onto a scholarship with the RCS in Edinburgh and so began the next chapter of my life...
From a very young age, all I ever wanted to be was a ballerina. On television I would watch the ballet for hours and would fantasise about the men dancers picking me up and letting me fly. I think for most young girls in Russia this was always a dream. Boys wanted to be footballers or scientists, girls wanted to dance ballet.
When I was 14 years old I was accepted into the Vaganova Academy in St Petersburg. It was the second year I had auditioned for this. Everyone in Ladushkin was very happy for me, I was in the local newspapers as it was not a big town and Vaganova was of course very famous.
I cried when I realised I would have to leave home, but my mother and fatehr were very supportive. We were not rich but certainly did not struggle for money, I realise looking back there would have to have been many sacrifices made to send me to this prestigious school. At the time I was not aware of this. Looing back I cry now when I think about it. I cannot thank my mother and fatehr enough for the chance they gave me in life, and I wonder if I was good enough to deserve it.
I worked very hard and studied very hard for years at Vaganove, not just on ballet and dance but also on academic studies. It was important to achieve all schooling as of course not everyone would get to be a dancer. I would be lying to say I enjoyed other studies. I did ok at chemistry, geography and literature but never mathematics or physics, my grades there were never good. My heart was only ever in ballet though.
I was able to achieve so much in dancing, I did a lot of performances and enjoyed all my years as a teenager at the academy. Of course there were temptations - I was in trouble more than once for meeting with boys and drinking alcohol, this was not well received but I understand it is part of growing up.
I was part of the performance group for a year after graduating from the academy, it was a wonderful time. We toured internationally, to Germany and to Sweden and Finland. I never had any main parts but was always able to perfomr on stage as a dancer, this was a dream. After a year or two I had the options, I could stay with the ballet or take the opportunity to travel. I was accepted onto a scholarship with the RCS in Edinburgh and so began the next chapter of my life...
36-40, F
