I Had a Skunk Encounter
Refreshed by the little perfumers.
I'd already begun to seriously miss max-strength, fresh-sprayed skunk enough that when the opportunity came to get my other pillowcase scented, I flipped the coin for a lake trip. Surprisingly, I won the toss by 1 out of 3 in the third round. I still hesitated to go get sprayed though since I DO have to go collect my paycheck in person tomorrow and don't want to embarrass myself in front of everyone by stinking up the joint. I found a compromise: My full painter's coveralls.
I put on the previously skunked coveralls and made sure to secure the gloves over them (since no matter what precautions I take I've had musk "sweat" off the big gloves and onto my wrists the last several times I've worn them). Heading to the lake at about 11:30 p.m. I could only hope the little stinkers were active. I was pleasantly surprised to find a young skunk before I even parked, keeping his location in mind, and then another nice fluffy adult with beautiful full stripes and coloration over by the patrol office. He was surprisingly close to a drainage pipe and knew it, so when I sneaked up on him I made sure to wait until he was completely sure there's no predators around and followed him slowly as he approached the marina.
Unfortunately, fate intervened again and some idiots on a moped drove by making lots of noise and scaring the little guy into ducking under a fence, but no matter, he still shrugged them off as they left and still hadn't noticed me. The little skunker ducked back under the fence and headed back toward his hiding space -- which of course I was blocking, and I made a mad dash right for the little stinker, my pillowcase in hand, waving it at him as I chased and tried to knock the little guy to his feet for a proper grab-and-milk. Unfortunately, all this did was get my coveralls sprayed, not the pillowcase.
Again, motorist idiocy interrupted me, as another SUV circled the office and the driver seemed to be contacting some other lake patrons that were probably fishing. This gave the skunk time to book it around the marina but luckily NOT through the fence, so I followed him around and got myself caught up, whipping the pillowcase at his rear as much as I could. Success, he sprayed it nicely, and that glorious high-sulfide thiolic perfume flooded the air just as it should. I followed the little guy some more afterward, but a cop turned on his sirens as he passed me so I decided that discretion might be in order to avoid drawing any further attention to myself. Plus, the little guy was genuinely scared to death of me and I can't stand prolonging that fear.
Reeking and fueled by the renewed stench, I looked a bit deeper into the golf course and came across the same little stinker I saw on the way to the parking lot. He merely lifted his tail and watched me, just laying on the ground, seeming to be surprisingly calm, likely rather confident in his ability to spray and scare off a human still. As I closed in slowly I spoke in low calm tones about what a beautiful skunk he was and how much I admired his scent and meant him no harm. Naturally he didn't understand me but didn't get overly agitated either until I started in with that pillowcase again, dragging it across his tail as he started off, getting a few more squirts along the sides. I thanked him just as I thanked the adult as he shuffled off.
Confident in my success, I only did a half-circle victory lap around the golf course, not finding any more skunks but not really minding that, putting my skunked items, including my coveralls, into the car VERY carefully (having brought extra towels this time for security) and driving home while obeying all applicable speed limits.
This time the spray is high in thiols, very heavy with the sulfuric and garlicky odors. It makes for truly "stinky" skunk, so I think maybe those were both males that got the pillowcase. When I put my nose right up to it the beautiful root beer/banana scent hits me and grips my nostrils and libido, making me want to wear it and letting all be right with the world again. I cannot wait to slip the pillowcase on and have Skunky Dreams all night once more :)
I'd already begun to seriously miss max-strength, fresh-sprayed skunk enough that when the opportunity came to get my other pillowcase scented, I flipped the coin for a lake trip. Surprisingly, I won the toss by 1 out of 3 in the third round. I still hesitated to go get sprayed though since I DO have to go collect my paycheck in person tomorrow and don't want to embarrass myself in front of everyone by stinking up the joint. I found a compromise: My full painter's coveralls.
I put on the previously skunked coveralls and made sure to secure the gloves over them (since no matter what precautions I take I've had musk "sweat" off the big gloves and onto my wrists the last several times I've worn them). Heading to the lake at about 11:30 p.m. I could only hope the little stinkers were active. I was pleasantly surprised to find a young skunk before I even parked, keeping his location in mind, and then another nice fluffy adult with beautiful full stripes and coloration over by the patrol office. He was surprisingly close to a drainage pipe and knew it, so when I sneaked up on him I made sure to wait until he was completely sure there's no predators around and followed him slowly as he approached the marina.
Unfortunately, fate intervened again and some idiots on a moped drove by making lots of noise and scaring the little guy into ducking under a fence, but no matter, he still shrugged them off as they left and still hadn't noticed me. The little skunker ducked back under the fence and headed back toward his hiding space -- which of course I was blocking, and I made a mad dash right for the little stinker, my pillowcase in hand, waving it at him as I chased and tried to knock the little guy to his feet for a proper grab-and-milk. Unfortunately, all this did was get my coveralls sprayed, not the pillowcase.
Again, motorist idiocy interrupted me, as another SUV circled the office and the driver seemed to be contacting some other lake patrons that were probably fishing. This gave the skunk time to book it around the marina but luckily NOT through the fence, so I followed him around and got myself caught up, whipping the pillowcase at his rear as much as I could. Success, he sprayed it nicely, and that glorious high-sulfide thiolic perfume flooded the air just as it should. I followed the little guy some more afterward, but a cop turned on his sirens as he passed me so I decided that discretion might be in order to avoid drawing any further attention to myself. Plus, the little guy was genuinely scared to death of me and I can't stand prolonging that fear.
Reeking and fueled by the renewed stench, I looked a bit deeper into the golf course and came across the same little stinker I saw on the way to the parking lot. He merely lifted his tail and watched me, just laying on the ground, seeming to be surprisingly calm, likely rather confident in his ability to spray and scare off a human still. As I closed in slowly I spoke in low calm tones about what a beautiful skunk he was and how much I admired his scent and meant him no harm. Naturally he didn't understand me but didn't get overly agitated either until I started in with that pillowcase again, dragging it across his tail as he started off, getting a few more squirts along the sides. I thanked him just as I thanked the adult as he shuffled off.
Confident in my success, I only did a half-circle victory lap around the golf course, not finding any more skunks but not really minding that, putting my skunked items, including my coveralls, into the car VERY carefully (having brought extra towels this time for security) and driving home while obeying all applicable speed limits.
This time the spray is high in thiols, very heavy with the sulfuric and garlicky odors. It makes for truly "stinky" skunk, so I think maybe those were both males that got the pillowcase. When I put my nose right up to it the beautiful root beer/banana scent hits me and grips my nostrils and libido, making me want to wear it and letting all be right with the world again. I cannot wait to slip the pillowcase on and have Skunky Dreams all night once more :)
41-45, M
