I Had a Skunk Encounter
A night of beautiful perfuming before the storm.
I planned this chase out better than most, having donated plasma Tuesday morning and having Wednesday off work so that I could successfully stink for a whole day afterward and have nothing to do that required hanging around people on my day off, so no one could be offended. I suited up at dusk and got to the lake around 10:00 or so, busted out my flashlight (which I'd put lithium batteries in since the pitiful coppertops it had weren't doing much of anything) and went skunk-seeking. It didn't take long for me to find the skunk that eats the cat food by the police station, but some family was setting off fireworks by the lake and blew my cover, so the skunk hurried off and sheltered up immediately. I tried waiting her out to no avail, and continued looking around the lake.
I found around 3 adult or teenage skunks at various places at the lake and gave chase each time, but found my stamina was lacking (probably from a lack of water in my system, I had too much coffee and had the runs all night so it probably drained it all out of me), so I couldn't keep up well enough to grab their tails, and every time I threw Penelope at them she would barely get sprayed at all. This went on over an hour of searching the golf course and chasing each skunk until I had to stop where they'd just enter a burrow and escape.
Before giving up with only minor misting on my skin, I decided to put Penelope by my car and head to the marina for one last skunk. Jackpot, there were 4 beautiful skunk kits sniffing around looking for grubs! Being smaller and easier to chase, I was able to get a few of their tails and rub my arm against their rumps to get sweet little squirts of musk, until I found one really adorable kit who stood his ground, stamping and scooting, giving me the full warning display. Playing along I got down on all fours and put me face even with his, stamping and teasing right back, and got sprayed directly in my face twice as he did what skunks do best when they're in such a standoff. I thanked the little gunslinger and some of the droplets hit my tongue as I encouraged him, telling him what a good stinker he was and what a tough and brave little skunk he'd been (and of course I realize they don't understand a thing I'm saying, but it's just polite, you know?).
The skunky oil tasted very bitter and like onions and garlic, as expected, skunking my breath beautifully. The little guy shuffled down closer to the water but even then continued to turn back around and warn me that he still had some musk left if I dared to come after him. To be honest, if it wasn't so slick and muddy down there I might've.
Anyway, I carefully put my skunked gear in a towel on my passenger seat and headed home reeking to high heaven, started to sit down only to find when I went back to my car to retrieve my cell phone that my best friend's car was parked behind mine. "Dude, where were you? I've been calling for an hour!" he said. "Well in case you haven't smelled me yet I was just at the lake getting sprayed. I had my cell phone locked in my car so it wouldn't get contaminated, that's why I never picked it up."
Regardless, he decided to go ahead and hang out with me anyway provided that I drove my car rather than ride in his, and I let him borrow a clean shirt of mine so that he wouldn't risk contaminating the one he was wearing and end up busted by his girlfriend. He's not a fan of skunk spray (and in fact has a really sensitive nose so I can only imagine how much it must bug him), but is so used to smelling skunk from hanging out with me that it doesn't bother him anymore.
We ate at the local Jack in the Box since they're one of very few places both open late and featuring a drive-thru (since I obviously would've been refused service at most restaurants when reeking of fresh skunk). Just my luck, the guy in front of me had a $50 order and that resulted in a ridiculous wait in the drive-thru line of around 30 damned minutes, giving us plenty of time to chat about stuff. We finally got the food (despite continuous failures on the staff and management's part, not even having rung my damned order out that whole time we waited in line) and ate it in the parking lot at Walmart before going in where I promptly began skunking up the place. At one point I even went to the Home department and stood in front of the running fans on display to spread my lovely scent around a bit. ;)
The night began to storm up as we were finishing shopping so I hurried out to roll up the windows in my car (which were down for aerating purposes), luckily making it in time to prevent any rain getting inside. We headed back to my place, Xan changed back into his street clothes and I brought in Penelope and my sprayed gloves, which I'd foolishly left out in the open figuring the only risk to them was theft, not rain (some part of me KNEW it would rain however given that it rained after my last chase and it was very cloudy and dark last night). With no easy way to dry them off I was stuck using paper towels and just hoping they don't mold.
Now however I get to enjoy my skunkiness. I've got lovely amber stains of skunk musk across both arms and sprinkled generously across my face from that kit, I'm sure, and I've been talking to my skunk-loving buddies on Skype and such to share my scent with them. It really is amazing how much this smell centers me and keeps me relaxed and content.
I planned this chase out better than most, having donated plasma Tuesday morning and having Wednesday off work so that I could successfully stink for a whole day afterward and have nothing to do that required hanging around people on my day off, so no one could be offended. I suited up at dusk and got to the lake around 10:00 or so, busted out my flashlight (which I'd put lithium batteries in since the pitiful coppertops it had weren't doing much of anything) and went skunk-seeking. It didn't take long for me to find the skunk that eats the cat food by the police station, but some family was setting off fireworks by the lake and blew my cover, so the skunk hurried off and sheltered up immediately. I tried waiting her out to no avail, and continued looking around the lake.
I found around 3 adult or teenage skunks at various places at the lake and gave chase each time, but found my stamina was lacking (probably from a lack of water in my system, I had too much coffee and had the runs all night so it probably drained it all out of me), so I couldn't keep up well enough to grab their tails, and every time I threw Penelope at them she would barely get sprayed at all. This went on over an hour of searching the golf course and chasing each skunk until I had to stop where they'd just enter a burrow and escape.
Before giving up with only minor misting on my skin, I decided to put Penelope by my car and head to the marina for one last skunk. Jackpot, there were 4 beautiful skunk kits sniffing around looking for grubs! Being smaller and easier to chase, I was able to get a few of their tails and rub my arm against their rumps to get sweet little squirts of musk, until I found one really adorable kit who stood his ground, stamping and scooting, giving me the full warning display. Playing along I got down on all fours and put me face even with his, stamping and teasing right back, and got sprayed directly in my face twice as he did what skunks do best when they're in such a standoff. I thanked the little gunslinger and some of the droplets hit my tongue as I encouraged him, telling him what a good stinker he was and what a tough and brave little skunk he'd been (and of course I realize they don't understand a thing I'm saying, but it's just polite, you know?).
The skunky oil tasted very bitter and like onions and garlic, as expected, skunking my breath beautifully. The little guy shuffled down closer to the water but even then continued to turn back around and warn me that he still had some musk left if I dared to come after him. To be honest, if it wasn't so slick and muddy down there I might've.
Anyway, I carefully put my skunked gear in a towel on my passenger seat and headed home reeking to high heaven, started to sit down only to find when I went back to my car to retrieve my cell phone that my best friend's car was parked behind mine. "Dude, where were you? I've been calling for an hour!" he said. "Well in case you haven't smelled me yet I was just at the lake getting sprayed. I had my cell phone locked in my car so it wouldn't get contaminated, that's why I never picked it up."
Regardless, he decided to go ahead and hang out with me anyway provided that I drove my car rather than ride in his, and I let him borrow a clean shirt of mine so that he wouldn't risk contaminating the one he was wearing and end up busted by his girlfriend. He's not a fan of skunk spray (and in fact has a really sensitive nose so I can only imagine how much it must bug him), but is so used to smelling skunk from hanging out with me that it doesn't bother him anymore.
We ate at the local Jack in the Box since they're one of very few places both open late and featuring a drive-thru (since I obviously would've been refused service at most restaurants when reeking of fresh skunk). Just my luck, the guy in front of me had a $50 order and that resulted in a ridiculous wait in the drive-thru line of around 30 damned minutes, giving us plenty of time to chat about stuff. We finally got the food (despite continuous failures on the staff and management's part, not even having rung my damned order out that whole time we waited in line) and ate it in the parking lot at Walmart before going in where I promptly began skunking up the place. At one point I even went to the Home department and stood in front of the running fans on display to spread my lovely scent around a bit. ;)
The night began to storm up as we were finishing shopping so I hurried out to roll up the windows in my car (which were down for aerating purposes), luckily making it in time to prevent any rain getting inside. We headed back to my place, Xan changed back into his street clothes and I brought in Penelope and my sprayed gloves, which I'd foolishly left out in the open figuring the only risk to them was theft, not rain (some part of me KNEW it would rain however given that it rained after my last chase and it was very cloudy and dark last night). With no easy way to dry them off I was stuck using paper towels and just hoping they don't mold.
Now however I get to enjoy my skunkiness. I've got lovely amber stains of skunk musk across both arms and sprinkled generously across my face from that kit, I'm sure, and I've been talking to my skunk-loving buddies on Skype and such to share my scent with them. It really is amazing how much this smell centers me and keeps me relaxed and content.
41-45, M
