I Want to Be In a Healthy Loving Relationship

@EnigmaticGeek I believe that one of the reasons ppl stay in one sided relationships is because they feel like they can't do better. Thus feeling is amplified by the fact that guys doh really ask me out. You assuring me otherwise did help though

@destinyfabulous I'm glad I helped.

Just know that you deserve everything you've ever wanted in a relationship. Somewhere, there is at least one guy who will not disappoint you.

Also, you don't have to date a guy exclusively to get to know him. In fact, you can often get to know a guy better and sooner if he isn't the only guy you're seeing, because if he has jealousy or insecurity issues, they are more likely to surface than if you are exclusive. It also is much harder for a guy to take you for granted when he knows you have other options.

@destinyfabulous they don't know what he was like behind closed doors.

What people see and are told isn't always the truth. The perception people give others is always positive.

You said yourself that he lies about you and makes excuses. So perhaps he tells everyone he does loads for you when really he gives you very little and you give him money.

What do his ex's say about him?

@Paliglass his exes are actually good to him. There's no denying that he treated them good...he used to organise everything for them...anything they wanted. Even the exes past fb post shows them thanking him for all that he has done w pics. He bought a car for one of them. Now he doesn't have anything to his name except prob a few dollars. Once of cousins actually got angry a lot when my bf bought really expensive things for them.
I don't know if its something I said or did in the past, that have him behaving like this with me.

@destinyfabulous huh - sorry. "something you did in the past" so that means you have to pay his way and be treated badly? No. It means if you did something that bad and he is that upset that he thinks it's ok to treat you badly then he needs to end the relationship with you. If he doesn't then he's just using this "thing you did in the past" as an excuse to be cruel to you.

If you can end it. It's kinder to him because he can stop being cruel to you and find someone to treat well and you will be out of this situation where you're treated badly because of "something you did" Sounds to me like you're being good to him, supporting him when he's in need and he's using you. He may have a "valid excuse" for him treating you badly but that doesn't make it ok. He may have been good to his ex's but that doesn't give him a pastport to treat you like crap.

It doesn't actually matter how he treated his ex's. It matters how he treats you.

It doesn't actually matter if you did a terrible thing to him in the past because that is no excuse to mistreat you- it's a reason to end the relationship.

PS I don't buy it that he was good to his ex's because people don't turn from some great person to a user over night. If he was buying them stuff then perhaps he was emotionally or mentally cruel to them. They might not even be able to acknowledge it because it's confusing when someone buys you stuff but is cruel - my ex was like that and it took me a long time to realise he was mentally and emotionally abusing me - it took me hitting him and going to a domestic violence class because I felt terrible. Did he feel terrible about how he was to me? Stopping me having friends, accusing me of having sex with his brother, saying he'd go on holiday with me and paying for it but letting me down at the last minute so I feel so disappointed and didn't understand why and unable to complain because he paid, I could go on. No way. He's a victim and I'm a terrible person that he did so much for. However he's still buying affection but he's still mentally cruel to his Gf.

Anyway stop beating yourself up thinking he's a great guy and you must deserve this treatment. You don't. If you have infact done more than his ex's and he did so much for them then he would be treating you like a queen and he would be if he was genuinely as you describe but he isn't. So there's something wrong with this story and it definitely isn't you.