I Think My Net Life Is Better Than My Regular Life
I am not lifeing very well at the moment. I'm battling with the craziest piece of software ever at work. At home my partner has this entitlement to anything and everything because she earns more, her job is harder, and she works longer hours (albeit for only 4 days a week). So she goes to bed when *she* wants to, gets up when *she* wants to, and I barely see her. When I do she's on her way out with friends or to study, or something. I have the equal and opposite entitlement: to her, to her time, to see that she currently works 4 days a week (and only an hour a day more than me on days she does work), she has loads of annual leave (triple the minimum in this country), and the prospect of working only 3 days a week for more money than most get working full time. So I believe I should be able to access her sometimes. Do things together, etc.
Right now I'm terrified of the 7 questions that help guide you to what makes your heart sing. Goal mapping. I want her to be by my side and we can do it together. I'll feel less terrible. I can't even tap on it, to reduce the fear - I'm afraid to reduce the fear because it means I might get an answer, and that means I'll know I can achieve said answer, and .. that's terrifying.
Panic attacks and life avoidance are rife right now.
And I'm supposed to be organising Open Firesides, a group where people can air what's holding them back at the moment and see if it helps to just say it - around an open fire of course. And go see my nan. And try to get annual leave out of my boss who basically doesn't know what I do and wishes it would be finished already.
I want out, wonderful people of SW, OUT!
Thank you.
Right now I'm terrified of the 7 questions that help guide you to what makes your heart sing. Goal mapping. I want her to be by my side and we can do it together. I'll feel less terrible. I can't even tap on it, to reduce the fear - I'm afraid to reduce the fear because it means I might get an answer, and that means I'll know I can achieve said answer, and .. that's terrifying.
Panic attacks and life avoidance are rife right now.
And I'm supposed to be organising Open Firesides, a group where people can air what's holding them back at the moment and see if it helps to just say it - around an open fire of course. And go see my nan. And try to get annual leave out of my boss who basically doesn't know what I do and wishes it would be finished already.
I want out, wonderful people of SW, OUT!
Thank you.
36-40, M