I - Js Judiciously Jumbled Jibber Jabber

Well I wish to annoy Josephia by posting on her group. Don't know what to write so I'll write about how my day went yesterday. I woke up to my alarm while drooling heavily. I managed to barely to throw my lifeless arm onto the the table on the side of my bed (no idea what it's called), in the process of trying to switch my alarm off I broke; a cup, a bottle of perfume, my lamp and the alarm clock. After destroying everything within my hands reach I fell asleep again only to me woken by my phone alarm and while trying to switch off the alarm I accidentally took a selfie of my startled self. The day didn't get much better from there, I ran into a wall on my way to the bathroom then ran into the bathroom door. Inside the bathroom I was taking a piss only to find out my Crown Jewels were in the perfect position for my wee to escape from the hole between the toilet and the toilet seat... Leaving behind a puddle of wee. Downstairs I was making myself breakfast and tripped myself with my own leg, luckily nothing happened. I burnt lunch (all 3 courses). For tea my uncle came over after not visiting us for 2 whole years, you see the reason he didn't visit in such a long time was because back in 2014 we had a massive house party and I was making tea for everyone and put salt instead of sugar unknowingly. I felt it was duty to make things right by making him tea and I did the exact same mistake he sprayed the tea out (the way he did 2 years ago) vowing never to come to our house again he also stated " if I never see any of you people again it would be too soon" (in Arabic Ofcouse). With that he left mind u while all that was happening mum was staring at him while sipping her tea and dad was reading his tea stained newspaper. I was sent to my room. There I just read and fell asleep. :3 I'm not usually the daft but there we go.