I Feel That I Have a Lot of Different Sides to My Personality

I know how this is going to sound; but i have an affinity for all things black and African American; i have since i was a little little girl and i still do today at age 34. Im thee whitest white girl ever, i have very pale skin freckles and almost black hair. I've never felt like i fit into that community of people though. I grew up as a child in the usa ( now in Canada) and i lived in areas heavily populated with blacks and Hispanics. I didn't start fitting into social situations with them until i was past high school age and now in Canada it doesn't even feel there's a distance between me and any other group of people. Were just human. But back to my point, i have always listened to the music since i could turn on my stereo, i wanted to dance like them..do my hair the same way..everything. I spent so much of my life digesting that information that now when i read essence magazine or any other magazine for black people or watch movies with an all black cast; i feel like it was made for me i feel like i am home. I am so white and don't pretend to be anything else, but deep down in my heart of hearts, i am consuming all the media that is aimed that is targeting that group of people. A lot of people don't know this about me. Im a strange bird.