I Have Been Bullied

Always been. And it's a long story as it went on for 9 years and in a way it haven't stopped. The bullies are still with me, although now in my mind haunting me instead. And I guess thats something everyone who has been bullied like this can relate to. I cant trust the people I'm close with. Im convinced that they are getting sick of me, as everyone else did. That I am too loud and too much of a know it all. And you know what? Im sick of it! Im sick of feeling like I'm weak for letting this STILL get to me. I am not weak, I was just terribly unlucky for a long long time. If someone was constantly punching you for a week, are you supposed to heal in a day? No. If I was harassed, betrayed, bullied and alienated for 9 years. How the hell are people thinking something is wrong with me for not being ok in 3 years? Nothing is wrong with me and I am not weak. Give me a break and I will heal. Just give me some more time.