Suddenly i want to die...again...

You need to get an MRI of your brain, and an ultrasound of your heart, and tho it is rare, get thyroid blood checked. Full blood panel.

Sub-clinical illness often presents with mood disorder. If you get pinned with a psych diagnosis when it is actually medical, you will fight for years for credibility.

Please don't. You have no idea what amazing thing may be right around the corner. I know you cannot fathom that it's there but that's because it's around the corner and you have to get up and move that way to see it.

I know because my genetic condition causes it, too. I don't take those thoughts very seriously, have learned to work with it. This is why psychology can mess us up. Failure to investigate medically. I had a psychiatrist lose her license for that, Dr. Rosalinda Rueca, Nevada. Record on State Board Discipline.

Had me on drugs I never needed for a condition I never had. My liver started to fail with all those drugs, my GP noticed when I saw him. I had jaundice but didn't know. Was charged also with insurance fraud. Lost 2 years of my life to her.

I hate it when that happens.
Waiting for that want to subside can be excruciating sometimes.

I tend to watch an older movie that takes me to a more innocent time when my brain does that to me, tells me such things.

https://consultqd.clevelandclinic.org/suicidal-thoughts-not-uncommon-in-ms-epilepsy-patients/

Because we can't see the future and are unsure.

We are here for you 😊

☹️🤗🤗