I Will Miss Robin Williams

Robin Williams is still one of my favorite actors of all time. I love how through his acting he has such joy that he's not afraid of showing on his face. He was someone who really gave it his all in every performance whether he was playing funny or serious. When I first heard about his death, my brother told me about it in a very casual way. In his words, he said "hey did you hear that Robin Williams just killed himself?" I didn't like that he said that so casually as if Robin Williams didn't matter. He was revolutionary. I loved his performances in Mrs. Doubtfire, Jumanji, one hour photo, Jack, Goodwill hunting, etc. So why is it that this one actor who always had the biggest smile on his face could do that himself? I was haunted by the news. Too shocked to even cry even though I wanted to. Robin Williams would probably be one of the last people I would ever think would kill himself. ba<x>sed on what people have said about him it seems like he always brought joy to peoples lives during hard times like when the people of 9/11 needed him and when Christopher Reeves needed him. When I heard it was a suicide, I thought that maybe the cops made a mistake. Because it all just doesn't make sense. I mean why is it that a man with a successful career, money, a wife, children, and friends would ever make him feel so alone? If all of that alone can't make you happy, then what CAN make you happy? Would make him feel like there's no one he can go to? Maybe it's like what Mork said in that episode of Mork and Mindy when he said that people are always looking out for number one and then they don't realize that there are other people around them who have it just as bad as they do. When you're a fan of an actor, you think that you personally know them because of all the research you've done and all of the appearances on TV and every single one of their performances. But that's the thing though – I DIDNT know Robin Williams. So there's no way I could've known what was going on in his head the day that he took his own life. But for someone to spend his whole life bringing joy and laughter into peoples lives, didn't he have anyone doing the same for him? Because I thought he had millions of people doing that for him. Maybe I was wrong. I'm scared that every time I look at Robin Williams again on TV through his movies or his interviews that I will always keep thinking in my head "this is a guy who wanted out and could be feeling broken right there." But I don't think Robin Williams would want anyone to think that way about his performances because he might feel that he wouldn't be doing his job as an entertainer by making others feel sad in that way. He would want the laughter to continue. It won't be easy to do that without him but I can only hope that Robin Williams is on stage in the kingdom in the sky feeling no pain or sadness. 150 characters on twitter will never describe how I feel about the passing of Robin Williams which is why I am glad I can express how I feel on here. I may not have known Robin Williams personally but I will never stop being a fan of his because his performances will always touch my heart as his memory is preserved on film and we will never stop watching. Thank you for what you've done for us, Robin Williams. ✌️